source

It aches me as a person to see how blind, insensitive and ignorant some parents can become. They are hardly there for their children when they need them, spend very little time with their kids and always busy. They fail to talk very often with their children and this pushes their kids to get the attention and a sense of care in the wrong places. Many children are forced to think that they are not loved and this pushes them into engaging with the wrong people, wrong activities and going to the wrong places.

It pains me when i see all these young teens report to the hospital with pregnancies and when you actually get to talking with them, in most cases it is always as a result of parents not spending proper time with their children. I know it can be pretty difficult for parents who work a lot but the truth is these kids need you. They need someone to listen to them, help them with their problems, difficulties in life and answer the questions they have; a reliable source of good counsel. That will not happen if you are always too busy or occupied with other things. In their desperation and frustration they will make pretty terrible choices which will not be the best.
Like they say,

Desperate circumstances call for desperate actions

It hurts so badl seeing these kids break down in tears of regret wishing if their parents were there when they needed them then their lives will not have turned out this way. That feeling knowing your life turned out the way it is because of your Mother/Father. It really hurts to know that the people who are supposed to love you most and care about you, protect you, direct you will end up being the reason behind your failure in life.

So it is in this light, that we will see a few tips on how parents can do better in their parenting to ensure a good outcome for their kids.

WAYS THROUGH WHICH PARENTS CAN IMPROVE ON THEIR PARENTING

1. Spend quality time with them

source

This is the most important factor to ensuring a better job at good parenting. Your kids need to spend quality time with you and it is in such occasions that they feel loved and cared for. It is also in such moments that they can open up to you and share some pretty surprising facts about their lives maybe in school, group, social life etc. Simply put, it is during such momwnts that you get to know a lot about them. Their passions, likes, talents and what they love to do. Take them out frequently and have fun together as a family. It is very important to consider this if parents want to do better towards their kids.

2 . Listen to them
Some parents fail to listen to their kids which is really not such a good thing. You need to always give them a listening ear to everything they have to say. Even thinhs you consider not important or funny just listen because with your demonstration of always giving a listening ear, you build trust and your children will feel comfortable to share everythinh with you knowing you will always listen and give them the attention they need. Especially for teens of about 14-18yrs of age who are very excited about life at this time. You nees to listen to them to get every details so as to better direct them. Some parents fail to listen to their kids and sometimes these kids can be going through a lot like bullying in school which is a common phenomenon, abuse, peer pressure, low self-esteem but because you never give a listening ear, they struggle with all these on their own.

3 . Proper observation

source

It is strange to me that a teen can hide a pregnancy for 6months under a family roof with parents. It is so strange but yes it happens and how?
Simply because some parents don't even take the courtesy to observe and follow up their children. They don't even know how their kids are normally so when an abnormal thing pops up they fail woefully to identify it. Yeah, that's how bad it is because some teens report to the hospitals with pregnancies that are over 6months and they live under thesame roof with their parents and they have no clue. Some teens even become pregnant, abort the babies and still the parents are clueless. So please parents do endeavour to follow up and observe your children for any changes.

If you keep a keen eye on your kids then every new thing they do or get into, you will be able to read the signs

So if parents can be good observers, then their kids will hardly take them by surprise. You will be able to identify problems or tell when something is wrong with your kids.

4 . Discipline
Many kids out there need a good rule of discipline and proper morals and that is the responsibility of parents. This is not to say you go all out so strict on your kids that they fear you. Not at all, because if they fear you, then they will never open up to you when they make a mistake for fear of what you will do. So just ensure average disciplinary measures and rules to safeguard good morals and upbringing. There are some kids that have become spoilt brats with no sense of respect or morals or proper upbringing. Remeber parents when such kids display such attitudes the blame returns to you for your failure to do a better job at parenting.

Train up a child in the way that he should go and when he's grown he will not depart from it

5 . Be a good instructor

source

Teach and direct them on pertinent issues of life. Especially sexual education as they approach maturity. So many teens have fallen into the hands of teenage pregnancy because no one ever talked to them on these things. Parents don't shy away from such discussions or tomorrow you will be bold enough to cry instead.
The situation is even worse in my community here where a child that asks about these things is seen as a spoilt and perversed someone. This is really bad as the number of teen pregnancies says it all. They parents don't talk on these things and the poor kids camnot even ask for fear of being labelled a spoilt child and only go out there in the open to learn it the wronh way with the results being teen pregnancy and even picking up diseases.

6 . Don't assume they already know
This is also a big mistake that so many parents out there make. They assume that their kids already know something just because someone else told them already. Parents you need to keep emphasizing everything you say to your kids until it sinks in. Don't assume they already know it because you said it once. Don't assume for example because you attend Church and the pastor talks against premarital sex that you think that will do it. No, you need to do more on yoir own part too, to make sure they don't fall into it. Learn to emphasize a particular point always even if you have to do it daily that it becomes a routine. Until they get it and you are sure they do, don't stop.

7 . Support them pursue what they love
So many parents already have planned futures for their kids but never take out time to consider if that is what their children really want. I know most at times they think it is in their best interest but when it comes to ones future and happiness i believe only they can make that choice. Parents can only advise, caution or direct their kids but not wise to impose anything on them. Give them the opportunity to choose what they want to pursue and support them rather than fight it. Fighting it only means fighting against their happiness and pushing them into living a life of regret.

8 . Be the perfect example

source

I watched a movie and a drunk father came back home all drunk and looked at his son who was staring not to ever drink. How hypocritical and funny is that?
Is he really going to take that advice?
So parents be the perfect example to your kids at home. Your life speaks louder than a thousand words you could ever alter and they learn a lot from you. If all you do is fight and fight then what example are you setting for them?

These are but few ways based on what i have observed through which parents can improve their relationship with their kids and in so doing, do a better job at parenting and ensuring that they raise up kids who feel loved and cherished.

So to all parents, i know raising up a child with all that responsibility is not always an easy task and want to appreciate the efforts you put, trying to give it your best and a good life for them. I appreciate and admire the efforts of those parents who are doing their best at being the best parents they can to their kids. A special admiration is for those single parents that end up raising amazing individuals in the society.
As for those who know that they are not giving it their best, it is not late to give it more effort and make the difference. Remember you can always do better...

Parents you can do better