DADY AND HER DAUGHTER
“Dad, I decided to take off the hijab”, my beautiful daughter announced yesterday, when we had a date to enjoy a day-out together.
"Oh wow little brother, when did you decide? Have you told mommy?”, we have been separated/divorced for several years, and he lives with his mother, but I am very close emotionally to my daughter.
"Well, she was very upset, but after talking to her for 3 days, she's ok with my decision"
"I am so very proud of you son.."
Several times I told about my daughter in posts:
Brooke Tris's answer to Have you ever had something that was both very happy and sad at the same time?
Brooke Tris's answer to What did someone say to you that you will remember most in your life?
Brooke Tris's answer to For parents, is there really such a thing as a favorite child?
Brooke Tris's answer to What was a minor achievement today that you're proud of?
Brooke Tris' answer to What made you angry yesterday?
Brooke Tris' answer to What do you think about taking off the hijab? My daughter wants to go on a student exchange to France, where the hijab is forbidden in public schools. She wanted to take off her hijab, but her mother forbade her.
He will be graduating from high school in a few days.
For me, she's the love of my life.
Two years ago, he didn't want to take a course, because he didn't have any friends. Then I always give subtle messages to foster self-love and self-confidence. With self-confidence, you no longer need to wait for friends to do something on their own. Follow your heart, follow your passion.
Since then, he has grown into a very confident figure.
For me, it's not about taking off the headscarf, but about having the courage to make a decision.
My daughter has been wearing the headscarf since elementary school in Sydney, the only female student who wears the hijab in her elementary school. And I always support her, even in high school when she does sports, she still wears a sports hijab. I will never stop giving my support to him. So, now that she has decided to take off the headscarf, I really support her 100%. I fully believe he has decided this with maturity.
In addition, he also has the skills to manage conflict with his mother who is quite conservative. (can be read in the link above).
He's not the type to be strong in arguments, so his skill in communicating things that are big enough so that within 3 days his mother can accept, that's also a skill in itself.
I always support my children in making their life choices.
I also agree with Kahlil Gibran, that they are children of life.
At any time, I will be there for support and advice, but the decision is completely up to them. My pride is watching them grow and develop into 'full' individuals who explore and believe in their own truth without having to inherit the truth from their parents or environment.
Your children are not your children
They are children of life who long for themselves
They are born through you but not from you
Even though they are with you they are not yours
In them you can give your love, but not your thoughts
Because they have a mind of their own
You can house bodies but not their souls,
Because those souls live in tomorrow's house, which you can never visit even in dreams. You can be like them, but don't try to make them like you. Because life does not go backwards nor is it in the past
You are the bows from which your children become living arrows launched
The archer has aimed at eternity, and he stretches you with his strength so that the arrows go swift and far
Make the archer's pull a joy
For when he loves the arrows that fly, he also loves the bow he has launched with all his might.