Lesson that almost make me broke in crypto.

I wanna write a story about my brief experience and dumbest of my mistake in cryptocurrency world..
first time i know bitcoin is early in january 2017.. it happen because i trying to buy some game in steam (game client) that can accept bitcoin at that time.. i dont have some credit card or paypal so i figure it out that bitcoin is some sort of currency.. digital currency.. how late i am to understand what bitcoin is and blockchain technology is.

anyway, i searching in google " how to exchange my money to bitcoin" and i find there local bitcoin exchange for my country.. i transfer my money to exchange and trade into bitcoin...
at that time... i'm quite new in investing and trading stuff.. i didnt know anything about it.. just buy it for a game in steam, quite facinating at that time so i bought few bitcoins and pay for the game relative easy compare using credit card..

not a while i become more curious about how to find money while doing trading infront of my laptop... so i start learn a basic how to trade, sell, buy and margin trading... and yes... i'm pretty dumb at that time... i self learn trading by my mistake and that mistake almost cost all my saving...

my first margin trading is in poloniex exchange while i'm put a long position at LTC before segwit network at that time for LTC... gain alot of profit from there.. so i get greedy.. i put more and more my money into bitcoin and start margin trading blindly.. that's the turn of the event start from profit become loss... such volatility in crypto market is crazy...
i cant take a loss in my trading so i hold my margin literally, hoping the price will turn the tide.. until that day is come... when all my balance is gone.. just like that..

at that day... i feel like suprise.. i really wish i die at that time.. how stupid and dumb i am.. i'm stressed out.. i barelly keep my mind together.. i blame my self.. i distanced myself from my friends, family and i'm alone.. i'm talking to myself. i'm thinking suicide at that time and i almost did it by overdosed by drink 5 pills for headache at that time.... well..

like the title said. i'm a bad trader.. didnt know the technical analysis and quite new in trading stock or crypto at that time. didnt have a knowledge about reading chart so well and it happen to me..

almost lost all my money in margin trading.. lucky me i had a saving money i hide somewhere, not much around 1,5k in usd.. so i use it... buy bitcoin, send to exchange and that time... i learn how to margin correctlly and safelly. searching about how to read chart and searching for next news for certain coin i try to margin.. try to take a little bit of profit while i can.. and until november 2017 i finally can get my loss back and around 200% more gain i get from my previous equity.. because bitcoin rise up so fast.. i get out from trading in november 2017..

my margin trading experience is being stressed me a lot. and i never gonna do a same mistake like i did in the past..
like put everything in one asset and being greedy..
in the end i rather buy bitcoin or other good potential digital currency or investment and hold it for a long time.

hope my mistake isnt get repeated by other.. hope you all have a good day...