Is it possible in these times to maintain loving, stable and lasting relationships ?.
To maintain stable and lasting relationships it is necessary to understand certain enigmatic points concerning love, that deep feeling of love and the need to be loved; To enter that stealthy and thin labyrinth of love, it is necessary to find ourselves with that cheerful and spirited aspect that we all have, so that it takes us along that path, but for this we will need to learn the necessary tools to achieve success in love.
The famous lyric poet "Sir Jonh Suckling" quoted: "THE ONLY FACTS OF BEING LOVED WILL NOT BE ENOUGH UNLESS WE HAVE ALSO BEEN WISE AND HAVE ENJOYED OUR LOVES."
What is it that makes us feel loved?
When we obtain in a relationship the 5 fundamental aspects that stand out in love:
Fuente propia.
We identify these aspects in a relationship:
- When we receive Love.
- When we receive Acceptance.
- When we receive Appreciation.
- When we receive Affection.
- And when it allows us to be free to live according to our needs and desires. (Admission).
We call these aspects the 5 "A's", these are the tools that will give us the keys that open the doors to success in Love.
There is in each of us, that notion of knowing that the satisfaction of our needs are given from our childhood by our parents. Since we were children we were unconsciously and very attentively watching whether our parents met or not, those requirements. Then we went looking for someone to replace and fill those gaps.
Many times we look for these duplicates of our parents in our relationships, but looking for a better version of them, even so, looking for a strength we create a weakness, because finding a person that meets our needs gives us the power to be controllers of our lives, and although they are very loyal to us, we create that toxic relationship where we limit our lives to control and it is not what we want.
The 5 "A's" begin in our lives as needs that our parents must meet, but later they become needs that our partners must also satisfy.
But to start receiving these 5 "A's" we must start with Dar.
First of all we must maintain a healthy EGO, and an excellent self-esteem to be able to start giving.
Let's start by giving ATTENTION: Attention to others leads to self-respect.
The first of the "A" Attention, is the center of attentive and dedicated attention, pay attention to that beloved, is to renounce our own ego, that attention awakens a genuine interest of who you are, and that is willing to give up whatever it is to be there at all times for that person.
ACCEPTANCE reproduces a perception of being inseparably, a good person.
Acceptance means that we are received very attentively and respectfully as we are, with all our feelings, choices and personal traits, and we are supported through them. This gives us security knowing ourselves and giving ourselves to others without barriers or fear, to love and be loved.
The APPRECIATION, leads to an effect of the own value.
The Appreciation, provides depth to acceptance go hand in hand, include a list of reasons and acceptances towards your partner such as the following: "I admire you, I enjoy you, I respect you, I value you, I recognize you and your whole being, you are my only or only one, this kind of encouragement or adoration as you want to call them, that they acquire riches of personal courage and trust, appreciation is synonymous with gratitude.
AFFECT makes us feel adorable.
The need of the human being is exquisitely, giving and receiving love and this love is represented emotionally, spiritually and physically. A hug from someone who loves us, is able to penetrate our bodies and restore our souls, all our fear, however immersed they may be erased by the caress of a lover. Love can be defined in more than one thousand ways, because each experience we have obtained from it is totally unique. That is why we leave marks on the soul of others with indefinite gestures of love, AS PERSONAL SIGNATURES. Affection refers to closeness or intimacy, both physical, spiritual or feelings. If affection is more than a strategy to get to sex, it is not real affection but rather petty and selfish manipulation.
ADMISSION, makes us go for our own needs.
Admission consists of showing the world who we really are, making our own naturalness known, when we live low the needs of others, it is showing a false self, what traps us in a vicious circle of who we are and who we want to be, we begin to join us in continuous submission. Once we accept who we are, we no longer allow ourselves to be controlled. most of the controlling people are not able to stop being because they do not control it, and by letting us control we give them command in the relationship, and it is not about control but respect and mutual understanding.
When a series of negatives in our lives like; When we talk and do not pay attention to us, when we show ourselves and we are not accepted, when we need love and we are not embraced, or we make a choice and we are not allowed to follow it, we realize that we are indisputably missing something. The opposite of this is when we perceive the 5 "A's", we feel satisfied and comfortable with ourselves.
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