Silhouettes between the opacity / Microrrelatos- Part 1

Maybe it was a dream, and I wanted with every fiber of me to be so. But the darkness was so chillingly real that my mere breath terrified me by making me think for a few seconds that something else was there with me, that something else was among the sudden opacity. And refer in my own thoughts to this atmosphere as sudden is the only way I can conceive to call it, because even struggling to remember, my mind fails to recognize the way by which it arrives or even the last moments in which not everything was darkness.

For seconds I tried to remember in vain, soon these moments became minutes and only God knows if they were also made hours, in that darkness everything was possible. I tried to speak, to say something for the first time, an idea that came from sighing and not even being able to perceive my own air escaping. I opened my mouth, in my thoughts as if it were a script the words were established, and none came out. I could not say anything, and the more I tried the more a sharp pain in my throat formed, as if something held me and pulled me in all directions and none at a time. The wet eyes did not wait and came along with perspiration, terror called tears and sweat, as if between them there was a strange trinity within this confusion. While I was drying my tears I thought I saw something at my feet; I thought it could be the work of my desperate imagination, like a poor devil wandering in the desert, who in his longing for water sees a spring.

I saw a small lantern that glimmered dimly in the shadows.

I tried to lean over to take the tiny flashlight, however, the same darkness that surrounded me also made my steps difficult, for the first time in maybe hours or who knows how long I've been here, I realized that I had not moved my feet more minimum It was extraordinarily peculiar that really, I had not even stood up a bit, always standing in the same place, petrified like a stone statue in the courtyard of Medusa.

With determination I leaned to take the weak light, I succeeded. And once I got it I felt a little more freedom, and the claustrophobic darkness did not imprison me as if I were meters deep under the sea. A sudden sky blinded for a second my fearful eyes, I naively believed that it was due to the light that my hands held. However, look at what once seemed like an endless corridor inside a dark world, now it seemed more like a corridor, I even thought I saw writings in what appeared to be concrete walls although blackened by dark huma that crept through the cracks. But that was not the most impressive thing that was played in front of me; an extremely dark silhouette, which despite being able to appreciate thanks to the weak light of the lantern that I held in my hands, it was not possible to differentiate it from a mere shadow, although peculiar. An icy air came to my heart, and it did not do it alone, the fear was only leveled with confidence and curiosity, a strange mixture of emotions that I do not think I have ever experienced.

Suddenly a light at the end of the road appeared illuminating the entire dark corridor, now I saw it clearly; It was a tunnel. And I also managed to distinguish the silhouette, it was a woman, with short hair and seemingly gray clothes. She began to walk in silence, so delicately that she could almost feel her feet moving through the air without hitting the ground in the slightest, like a dancer in an intermediate wind, neither too agitated nor too weak.

I tried to get his attention, maybe in the darkness and even as a weak lantern he had not noticed me. The more I tried to let out some sound, some simple word, the more the pain in my throat softened, as if some external or even internal force held me and I could not avoid it or see, I was silent in a world of shadows and where Light seems to be as scarce as good feelings in what used to be my world. If the woman took a step, my body moved and gave one exactly the same, such a puppet manipulated by invisible puppeteers. When it seemed to approach the light, the female figure turned her face a little and looked at me out of the corner of her eye, her eyes in the weak light of the lantern, they were as black as the fog coming from the walls.

His face smiled and a chill ran through my being. But not for being a malevolent smile, but for the almost divine kindness that reflected on his lips and cheeks. He raised his arms and something even more amazing that the light at the end of the tunnel caused me to be startled, because the whole tunnel itself turned as if it were fog. With her left hand she signaled, I deduced what it means to follow her and I started walking slowly, I could not do more than that. The woman disappeared, entering the light as if entering a world of clouds and heavenly cotton. I tried to speak once again, however, the usual pain continued, nor did my snorting seem real. The tunnel expanded into a large black room, the floor was still wood and the white light was on the other side of the room, now it was an open door that connected the light with this darkness.

I walked with a start, now I could move more easily, without the black fog that seemed to slow me down. The distance between the door and me was considerably high, so I trotted, almost running desperate. However, I stopped short, completely paralyzed by something more than simple fear, it was real panic and I did not understand clearly what was the reason. Sol saw a chair on the floor, thrown away; as if someone was kicked or dropped from it. I looked more closely, there were traces of liquid, it was blood. I started running to the door, now more terrified than before, despair surrounded and penetrated me.

Once again I stopped for other strange objects, a wedding ring lying on the floor next to white roses, extremely withered and with tiny drops of blood.

I touched the blood attracted to it for a reason that I can not explain, holding it between my fingers I perceive its aroma, it smells as it should smell the blood, although for some reason, I perceive it too familiar. As if my nose had been bathed with blood recently. I walked a little more, I was about to arrive before the door of enveloping light, I almost feel the heat that the radiance radiates. However, before being bathed by so desired light, a last object was in front of me, at my feet; a rope with a knot. I took it and caressed it, my hands reacted to it, I had held it before and the pain in my throat worsened. Before all prognosis and against any logical thought, I wear it to my neck and fit perfectly. The pain vanished and my voice returned, and also the memories. Tears dampened my eyes and overflowed my cheeks.

-What have I done? - I let dry my tears. I turned and saw that the door opened even more and the light shone with greater intensity. - I do not deserve to go in there ...

-You deserve it and you can not imagine how much. - a voice said coldly behind me. It was the woman who guided me, I recognized her, she was my wife.

From the light several celestial arms came out and pulled the rope around my neck. That feeling recognized her, because it was thanks to her that I am in that place, before faith a way out, now it was my punishment. I entered the light and I did not feel the heat that was promised to me, on the contrary, it was freezing cold, more cold than space, so cold that my skin was freezing, but it was sticking again. I can not die anymore, not again.

That place of light was extremely small, a single small square, a cube of whitish crystal very pure, except for me, that I am rotten. The rope rose alone in the air and I take it with her, and no matter how much she will swing me, she did not move. I feel that I drown but never reach the coveted end, because it has arrived before. The light illuminated more than my body, illuminated my soul, I know why I am here; the objects, the woman ... everything is my fault. When I was in the world as I knew it, I was married. But that was never enough for me, no, I always wanted more. Soon the women did not fill the void and I began to abuse substances, all while my wife tried to help me in vain. One day, when a heated fight took place and I did not control my anger, I pushed her and she fell breaking her neck by a small chair.
Tears sprouted which in that place were highly corrosive, I feel the ardor go through my face, although nothing compared to the pain of my soul.

Since I lost her, bring white roses to the place where she died. The madness plunged me, life had no meaning, it was not just guilt, it was something worse, an absolute sentimental void. And the end came, use a rope and the same chair that died ... fast and simple. After remembering those events, the rope became a little less strong, enough to let me speak. I knew I was there for my actions, I deserved it.

-I deserve it…

-All have a punishment. - Said an invisible voice inside the cube of light with me. - You tried against two lives: the one of a person who loved you and against yours.

-Is this my punishment?

-No ... this is your hell.