Being treated like an emotional punching bag is awful and horrible.
It happens for no apparent reason, people using you, treating you like a doormat, walking all over you. They may have had a hectic day or maybe in a bad mood, but at the end of the day they dump all their awful emotions in you and leave it to you to handle yourself without thinking about what you want or what’s best for you. The more you drown yourself in their emotions, the more it goes on increasing. There's just no escape once you are trapped in the tangled mesh.
The people surrounding you no longer care about your sentiments and don’t even bother to invite you in sharing their happy moments. At some point they start believing that you are the dump to store and absorb all their shocks and jerks.
Self-respect is the first step in freeing yourself from all the shackles that are bounding you and keeping you caged. So, treat yourself with respect and dignity because if you fall in your own eyes, it’s hard even imagining people are ever going to give you an ounce of respect.
Here are some ways to stop being treated like a punching bag and start being respected-
- Be a better version of YOU
If someone else is degrading you and trivializing your worth there’s a high probability that you’re doing the same thing, so the change has to begin with you. Be profoundly honest with yourself— Of course, you deserve to be treated with utmost respect because you are good enough to fit in just like others.
Change kick-starts with you piling up your self-worth; something that can be started in the following ways:
a. Give yourself credit for your accomplishments—all those small and big things you have achieved and faced in life. b. Acknowledge your values—those things that are embellished within and through you and makes you stand out from the rest of the crowd. c. Nourish your mind, heart and soul—nobody can help you and serve you better than yourself.
2.Start tutoring people
Your stimulus to people’s behaviour is an indication of how you like to be treated- whether the conduct is acceptable to you or not. So, if you absorb their attitude and accept whatever they give, the message is that it’s okay for you to be treated like that.
It’s strange to say and harder to digest that people are programmed in such a way that they will always do what works for them until they have evidence that it doesn’t work, or they are told to call it off.
If someone treats you like their emotional punching bag on a regular basis, it is not okay. Your task no matter how difficult it is going to be for you is to change your response and to start giving them the message that you don’t like their etiquette. This doesn’t have to be done in a melodramatic manner, it can be done gently and with the same respect that you want. Give your fear a back seat and start teaching people about how they should behave with you.
As the well-known saying goes, help them help you.
3.Stop being a people-pleaser
I can firmly say that being a people-pleaser is not a selfless act rather a selfish one. You might begin with the best and purest intentions but eventually it might lower your self-esteem because you keep doing merely to gain validation for what you have done or to simply hear the golden word “Thank you” repeatedly.
This will not only allow people to take advantage of you but also lower down your morale.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we were benevolent to people not because of any recognition but because there’s value in the very act of giving?
Think of any day to day situation where the question of whether you are confident about your decisions or not arises... At home (It maybe cooking a meal at home or buying a new set of crockery), or it might be something at work (like participating in a discussion, writing the minutes of the meeting or solving a trivial issue).
Natural confidence is being able to trust your decisions and attitude with implicit faith in your abilities, so when you do anything, there’s no uncertainty about your ability to do it—you have the power and cent percent spirit to do it right.
- You deserve more
If you’ve truly done all you can to change the situation to stop being treated like a punching bag and nothing seems to work, then get the hell out. Life is way too short to experience all things on yourself and get your self-esteem damaged by someone else also made up of flesh and bones just like you.
If you are willing to, remove yourself from the situation or relationship you are tired of and start building the kind of life you’d love to live.
You don’t need to “keep on keeping on”, and you also don’t need to put up and adjust yourself with being treated like a punching bag.
You deserve more, so jump out.