My son is aggressive, what can I do?

guada1 (59)in #edu-venezuela • 5 years ago

The aggressiveness of children is a sign of internal emotional distress, a complex of negative experiences. An angry, aggressive, and struggling child is a great pain of the parents, a threat to the well-being of the children's team, a "storm", but also an unhappy creature that no one understands, does not want to caress and pity.

SourceSuch children take every opportunity to push, hit, break, pinch. His behavior is usually provocative. To provoke aggressive response behavior, they are always ready to anger mom, caregiver, partners.

They will not rest until the adults "explode" and the children do not fight. For example, such a child will consciously dress more slowly, refuse to wash his hands, remove toys until he pulls the mother out of himself and hears her scream or get slapped. After that, he is ready to cry, and only after receiving consolation and affection from his mother, will he calm down. Is not it a very strange way to receive attention? But this is for this child the only mechanism for the "liberation" of psycho-emotional stress, the accumulated internal anxiety.

In our lives, unfortunately, there are many events that they can harden, embitter, despair and cause negative experiences. Children clearly capture the mood of others. Therefore, parents should not allow a discussion of problems with a child, watch programs about catastrophes and movies about murder and hopelessness, negatively evaluate the actions of others, reproach and threaten criminals.

SourceSuch manifestations of their dissatisfaction and resentment are not the best example to follow and the boomerang can return to the family in the "performance" of the child. Adults should not be surprised at why their son word by word repeats his abusive expressions, is in a position of constant resistance and rejection of the people and events that surround him. If you begin to notice that your child is electrified with anger, this has a name:

When it started?
How does a child show aggression?
At what times does the child show aggression?
What caused the aggression?
What has changed in the child's behavior since then?
What does a child really want?
How can you really help him?

The causes of aggressiveness are almost always external: family anguish, deprivation of something desired, the difference between the desired and the possible. Therefore, it is necessary to begin to work with the aggression of your child with an independent analysis of intrafamilial relationships. This will be the main step to solve the existing problem.

Having found signs of aggressive behavior in your child, play with him in the games presented below:

Source

"CHILD FOOTBALL"

(for children from 4 years old)

Instead of the ball - a pillow. The players are divided into two teams. The game number of 2 people. The judge is an adult. You can play with your hands and feet, you can kick the pillow, pull, remove. The main objective is to score a goal.

Note: an adult controls compliance with the rules: hands and legs should not be moved if there is no pillow. Sanctions are removed from the field.

"TOWER TOWER"

(for children from 5 years old)

From the pillows built high tower. The task of each participant is to take it by assault (jump), emitting triumphant cries such as:

"Aaaa", "Hurray!" and so on. The winner is the one who jumps into the tower without destroying its walls.

Note: Each participant can build a tower of such height, which, in his opinion, can conquer.
After each assault, the "fanatics" make loud cries of approval and admiration: "Well done!", "Great!", "Victory!" and so on.

"CROAR, CROAR"

(for children from 5 years old)

The pillows are placed on the ground at a distance, which can be overcome in a jump with a little effort. Playing - "frogs" living in the swamp. Together in a "bump" frogs "frogs" up close. They jump on the pillows of the neighbors and croak: "Kwa-kva, move!" If two "frogs" are near a pillow, then one of them jumps or pushes a neighbor into the "swamp", and she is looking for a new "bundle" for her.

Note: an adult also jumps over "bumps". If among the "frogs" it is a serious conflict, jump and help find a way out.