ULOG NO. 6: The Stolen Phone Is Back (Second Part of the Diary of a Dialysis Patient Story)
Hi steemians!
This is the reason I kept on telling everyone to sync their phones with their google photos account. It is because I got my cellphone back. All because of the said application. Yeheeeey!
As promised, here is the second part of the #diaryofadialysispatient hahaha. @meetmysuperego, this is how I got my cellphone back. For fun, I am going to make some sort of a diary like @cryptopie's Dear Diary. This is also in relation to @surpassinggoogle's #ulog #ulogs #teardrops #untalented projects.
In short, I am going to make a narration/story about how my life progresses. This is also in preparation to my upcoming project of making and/or publishing a book here in the Philippines.
This is the second part of my story here on steemit; however, if God permits, this would be one of the middle stories of the book I am trying to write. The book is a combination of life, comedy, romance, and drama. But more humor, definitely. And this isn't the exact same thing that will be published, fingers crossed.
Read this before scrolling down. Part 1
Part 2
Ashley. What a beautiful name.
Ashley. What a cruel being. She was the one who was using my phone the whole time. She was the one who kidnapped my phone. Or cellnapped. Whatever. Nevertheless, she's a monster. And I need revenge.
I am going to get my phone. I am not going to beg. I will seek revenge hahahahahha (insert some more evil laugh).
Scanning and perusing all the alien photos in my account, I found out that their surnames are P******L. This is because the culprit kept on taking selfies with a calendar behind her. And the calendar has their surnames knitted in large letters. NARCISSISTS! SELF-CENTERED! THIEVES!
I also found out that her grandmother is my blood spa gang in the dialysis center. With this, I immediately made a decission. I am going to let these cellnappers taste my own justice. The LAW OF A DIALYSIS PATIENT hahahahhahaha (more fucking evil laugh).
I cannot wait any longer. On my dialysis (or blood spa because we are super rich and cool #sarcasm), I asked the head nurse if she knows any patient with a P******L surname.
"Jackie! Jackie!" I was like the idiot version of Vice Ganda. "Do we have any patient with this surname?" She immediately said no. Wow! Galing! She did not even make it thrilling. Suspense. Such a downer for my own scene. ".
Tangina. No surnames with that surname. So the calendar with the family name? Did they just tricked me? Have they fooled me? Did these thieves made me look like a total douchebag? Did they stole the calendar from P******L family too? Hahahahhaha. This is all because I assumed. Too much assumptions. That is the reason why we always keep on being hurt by our crushes. Boom! Utot mo!
So I asked the other nurses. They have not heard the said surname as well. So I let them see my.......let them see my...... my ace. The picture of the dialysis patient. Now this is not an assumption. This is now 100% sure. She is a dialysis patient. Because she also has a katana-like structure in her neck. Just like mine before. Eureka!
"Guys, do you know these people?"
"Ow! That's ........". Let us keep her identity a secret. Let us call her Trump lol. How dare you Trump! Did you not pity my selfies there!? My homescreen wallpaper? Even with my lockscreen wallpaper with me making an Oblation pose, with my hands stretched in both sides. You have no mercy trump. Booooooo! Boooo! Trump! You are the reason my phone and I are separated. Our four year long relationshit.
However, their blood spa schedules are on Tuesdays and Fridays. And on seven in the morning. Uuuuugggggghhhh! You really making my life miserable, Trump huh?
Monday evening and I couldn't sleep well. Will I yell at them? Will I give a great speech. Is my tongits there still on level 20. Haist! Hail Hydra!
Tuesday.
7 o'clock in the morning. I was ready to charge. This is the right time to kill the opponent. The right time to get what is mine. To fight for my love hahahaha. I opened Spotify and listened to Rihanna's Bitch Better have my Money and "Man Down", DJ Khaleed's All I Do is Win, and Shanti Dope's Sikretong Malupit (grabee grabee).
I arrived at the hemodialysis center. I opened the door. Lo and behold! Trump's there. That face! That person whose granddaughter has been using my phone without my paking consent. I want to erupt in anger. I want to ask Trump if he believes if the earth is flat. I wanna know if he thinks he is a great president. Lol. I want to shout. I was super angry. But I am a composer. I composed myself. I need to be cool because there is a cute nurse nearby. Composer.
I approached her and show her face on my google photos account. I lied and said, "I attached a hidden camera on my phone and I can se you all". I was laughing and rolling in my head. Such an evil creation. Kidding aside, I remained such a nice composer.
"Good morning po". Composer, remember. Conceal, don't feel. Put on a show.
"Uhm! Fuck you bische, where is the phone you stole from me." Let it goooooo! Hahahahha just kidding. I am not that evil. Although the hidden camera lie was emphasized hahaha.
I told her everything. How I lost my phone and how I tracked it to them.
I asked if the girl using my phone was there. She said no. Instead, she has her sister with her. Although, she was still eating at the canteen at that moment. "Eat well, my dear. Because I will show you my evil side. The justice of a PWD"
Her sister came. She was not in the google photos. The moment she saw me, I approached her, she said "OKAY! I WILL TRY TO LOOK FOR IT."
DAPAK DID SHE SAY. I haven't opened my mouth yet and she already knows what I was up to? I tried to be the best composer version of myself as possible. Although, it should be noted that I was already barbequeing them in my head. I was a pro composer. I tried to ask them how my phone got in their hands. HOLY BEARD OF MERLIN! I heard the most stupid answer from a bitch thief.
"We saw it. We tried to look for the owner but no one acknowledged. So we brought it home. Others might take it so we took it immediately. Finder's keepers!" WOOOOOOOOOOOW! ADVANCE THINKER! Lechugas na bulok
I asked how come my phone cannot be contacted that time. They said a more stupid answer. "We took the sim card out immediately".
EVERYTHING DONE IMMEDIATELY. IMMEDIATELY. IMMEDIATELY! AND YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO TELL ME THAT IT WAS NOT STEALING? NOT YOUR INTENTION? IF IT WAS NOT YOUR INTENTION TO KEEP MY PHONE, WHY TOOK THE SIM CARD OUT WITHIN FOUR HOURS AFTER YOU FOUND IT? LIARS!
Still, I composed myself. If I got angry, maybe Trump will have difficulty breathing or whatsoever in her situation because she was already hooked in the dialysis machine. So I tried to be patient, although I am already a dialysis PATIENT lol.
I wanna punch them in their faces. So before demon took my soul, I asked for my phone back. They said they do not have it with them. And they will give it back on Friday, their next dialysis session.
So eager to take my phone back, I waited patiently for the days to pass. And on Friday, I got my Oppo phone back. Yehey, mission accomplished! Although.....
●My tongits game was uninstalled
●My contacts were deleted
●My phone has flowers as wallpapers hahahahha
Nevertheless, I have my phone. And I feel so good.
PS: They want me to teach them how I manage to track them. How google photos work. I tried to explain but I was already late at work amd I was pretty mad, in a cool way.