Self forgiveness 2

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I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let things happen inside of me so fast that I cannot stop them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to be vulnerable where I let things happen so fast that there will be nothing I can do but take the blow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to attack where I'm so overwhelmed with things happening so fast that I automatically lash out within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to control myself through consquences which I cannot defend myself from because of how fast they occur.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fuck myself over by making things occur within me which I don't stand a chance against.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to bite off more then I can chew to prove my worth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cheat myself in trying to get ahead of the way Im natrually capable of handling things.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel overwhelmed by how I've lost my handle on my self.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear things getting worse because of my lose of grip on myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desperately try to take on more then I can chew to gain power.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to prove a point over the natural order of life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being trapped in a fuck hole.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to grasp how much I've fucked myself over in betraying the natural order of life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not appreciate how everything worked out for the best and I learnt a great lesson in time and many things in biting more then i can chew.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make biting more then i can chew a detremental habit.

When and as I see myself angry at the persistent consquences of having bitten off more then I can chew in my process, I stop, I breathe, I realize that I made a decesion to take on as much as I can and became overhelmed and disorianted, thus, I commit myself to work towards stability while still standing by my commitment to take on as much as possible within myself through self forgviness and correction.