The Presence of Nothingness, My Battle With Depression

Nothing. Picture it. Empty, dark, cold, desolate. This is where I've been living for two months now. Attacks of the "poor me's" and "no one cares." Why? Because I have no contact with the outside world save my doctors.

I was diagnosed with Meniere's Disease three months ago. It blesses the patient with unpredictable bouts of vertigo, dizziness, nausea and ear pain. The only solution I've found is sleep. Tomorrow I see a specialist who will stick a needle through my eardrum and inject steroids in a hope to allieviate this affliction. He tells me it isn't pleasant. Well, neither are the symptoms I'm dealing with.

So you see, I stay home, afraid to drive or even leave -what if I have an attack and have a wreck or fall? I've pushed away what few friends I had because I had to cancel plans so many times. They gave up I guess.

Writing has always been my therapy. I stopped writing a year ago - I was just too busy. So here I am alone in the nothingness. For now.

Don't worry. I will rise from this depression and out of the nothingness. It just takes time.