Will this be the one?
Hello Steamers.
I like many others have bouts of depression. Mine is not the worst case nor the easiest. Now I've been on a low after returning from a holiday. Which is nothing unusual. But today whilst walking to my daughters school, I realised I felt pretty energized and had a good feeling that seemed to buzz all over me. I love this feeling, it makes me want to quit all my bad habits, to be more social, to conquer all my goals. But I have been here many times before and know now not to get too excited about my new found vitality. I know that around the corner is the inevitable dip back to my darker side. So whilst I was noticing this new feeling I started to wonder how far this "high" would take me. How long would this one last? Would this good feeling stay long enough to allow me to start my business or would my confidence vanish like a magicians coin and cause the usual crash of personality.
But maybe, like surfing, you get lots of different types of waves. Some you surf and some you leave. Some waves give you inspiration to keep trying and other chuck you in a rip and spit you back out to see. But you just have to wait for that one wave...the one that takes you all the way back to the beach.
I hope it is, but if not I'll keep on surfing dude!!!! To all my fellow miserable gits, keep on keeping on.
Your post definitely resonates with me. I am often fighting off the dark place. Walking (or any form of exercise) helps. Using my energy to focus on positive things and not wallowing in the dark place helps too. And I will continue to fight gravity until I have no choice and they put me 6 feet under.
I feel you dude, but don't be hard on yourself ever. If you believe you're depressed, you're going to be depressed. But, if you can listen to all those positive thoughts... you can be free'd from depression. If anything it's a poncy scheme on peoples lives with medications and right now "we" are all the trial and errors. And, when you look em up - there's a lot of errors. Don't misplace your heart and focus and stay active. Keep your daughters in mind and do everything you can to make your day brighter. Sometimes we just have to go through some hard times to get to the positive results... just keep pushing. I don't think you're depressed - I think you're over stressed and feel like you've neglected your own hearts emotions. I was there, and I got off medications and I feel free now... Free from all that clutter anyways, am I depressed or am I not depressed? Huh, I think I'll just choose that I'm not, and go rollerblading, and do something active that I love. And, you know what? It was the most amazing feeling that I could have ever felt. Just that. Rollerblading and listening to my most inspiring jams on the headphones. Nothing could beat it, and it was me against the world now. Read some of my work, I bet you'd like my book on here. Thanks for sharing your deepest heartfelt thoughts on the matter. You're going to succeed bro. Keep up the positive and keep on fighting those dark times away... and one day your mind will feel what I felt... kick the medications if you can, and you can experience things a little differently... it might be hard to do, but my body and my mind were irreplaceable when I was off medications... that's the way I want to stay!
Good luck!
Thanks Steamers! Glad you liked the post. Its nice to get things out of your head and connecting with people in similar positions is great too.