It seems like it is a matter of choice. If you want to end the paranoia, the sleepless nights, the constant fear, simply stop. You seem to realize the position you are in and have a chance to act before the inevitable "If I only would have stopped yesterday" hindsight which you are barreling towards. Sit on your hoarded wealth and count it as a bonus as you start a new life realizing how lucky you are to have escaped the old one unscathed.