Dad Tip of the Day: Pick Your Battles

in dad •  5 months ago

Dad tip of the Day: When it comes to parenting kids, you should be firm and choose what is going to be a red line that can’t be crossed, but let the rest go and embrace the chaos.

I think everyone can agree that kids are crazy, messy, difficult and they break stuff. For us parents, things will often get wild and it will push you outside of your normal comfort zone – the key is finding the right balance of firm and fun.

We shouldn’t be always saying “no”, but we certainly cannot always say “yes” either. The balance is different with each kid, as they all have unique temperaments and quirks, which requires fast adjustments on the parent’s side. Kids will rebel against parents who have too tight a grasp and won’t let them have any fun, but will also take advantage of too much freedom if the parents are too apathetic. Striking the right balance of authority and friend will be different with each kid.

Taking my son Jacob as an example, for me a red line that cannot be crossed is splashing water out of the tub and getting the floors, walls and ceiling all wet – not OK. I will pick that battle and put an end to that behavior. However, on the flip side, if we are outside and playing I will let him get as dirty as he wants to, including rolling around in the dirt like this picture:


Another battle I have taken up is when the toys start destroying the floor – Jacob has a few ride-on type of vehicles that he used to be able to ride around the house, however, as he gotten older and more wild/aggressive, the power sliding of the toys around the house was leaving too many scratches on the hardwood floors, so I had to relegate a few toys to be outside toys only, despite the fight and tears. On the flip side, Jacob has some Radio Controlled cars that are probably meant to be outside, but that do not really do too much damage to the house, so I will sometimes let him run them inside.

Picking your spots to put your foot down verses letting kids be kids is a parenting lesson that can be tough to master, but the key is to keep working at it and improving!

Would love to hear any thoughts you have my friends!


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really very inteligent thought of you.its very needs for every child.i think that,you are a good father in the world.because always i am seeing you very carefully take care and every knowledge to give your child. obviously your son jacob very talented and he being a big person in the world..your opinion alltime right and logical. this responsibility to handle doing to raise not easy.but you every step to take proper time for your children. parents is a main teacher for every child. thanks to sharing for your good posses to raise..great post. very well dear friend @brian.rrr take care yourself and best of luck of your great work.

For the parents, parenting is a titanic task, I have a little boy who often makes me break the normal rules, allowing all the toys in the living room was hard to understand, but in the end he is a child and needs his pleasant moments, as he grows up I adjust a little more, at least after many conversations, he understands it.... but I always waver just to see him happy.

Hello how are you? to raise children in an arduous job you must have pascience and a lot of dedication to teach them as you say not to cross the red line to everything has its moment and what they did when they were small is not the same
Work and improve is how you say the key to being good parents
Jacob is bigger and stronger but little by little he will get better
I send you many greetings from Venezuela

It's absolutely right sir.

Every child is born with their own talent.

The talent of each child is so sharp that.

They try to learn as they see their parents, brothers, sisters, whatever they do.

But parents think that what kids are doing is not right.

That is why parents do not want to give adequate freedom to children.

But we forget the parents that the little child can become one day a very big man.

The talent that kids have, but we can use them in many ways.

Just understand that kids can do a good job.

Thank you so much sir,

To write a beautiful article about kids
And thank you so much for taking pictures of your child so beautiful.

Hahaha very dirty term looks beautiful and it is the right thing is not to say no or if it is to teach them that they should have a good behavior that there are places where they should follow rules but there are others where not so much, it is not always good to say yes or leave they do what they want, even if you say they are very strong, it is the truth, so you have to adduce them and make them behave, it is a good advice not always to say yes, as it is not always to say no and to restrain them that in the long run many consequences

Friend, how are you? I agree with you everything should be a balance many times the parents believe that with always saying yes and if it will be fine but it is not good to always say that if for everything to grow we will have more problems as always saying that it is not good either is as you say you should know or what spadres should know what to access since not

It is so important that our kids learn at a young age to respect that there are rules that we must follow in life. You are absolutely right that picking your battles is key. There needs to be flexibility in our thinking but also, our kids need to understand that when we have decided that something is not ok, it is not up for discussion. If we always give in to our kids and let every decision we make a discussion then we are going to regret that as they become teenagers.

Your child is wonderful and your opinion about raising children is logical. The responsibility to raise children is difficult, and it is not easy to say yes or no to them thank you for sharing the nice topic i like it

The most beautiful sight in the world is a little child going confidently down the road of life after you have shown him the way... So sweet child @brian.rrr

So beautiful, sure I am that I enjoy playing outdoors, with children there is no strict manual but raising in love and respect makes everything flow.

No existe un manual que nos diga como criar de forma correcta a nuestros hijos, sin embargo existen ciertas enseñanzas que no podemos dejar pasar por alto, el punto que explicas me parece realmente interesante, como padres siempre debemos establecer limites con nuestros hijos, saber hasta donde los podemos dejar llegar! Saludos...

Difficult to find a balance but when it is finally achieved, everything is more practical and dynamic.
The complex thing is that each child is different even if you raise it equally. I'm telling you that he crie 4.

It seems to me that the hardest thing is to say you can not play with a toy here, it's when you look at it.
Achieving those parameters and rules is really difficult and necessary.

Now he wants to run over stuff and go crazy that’s what you mean right

"Parents" a primary element in the family

an imaginary line, where the yes and the do not separate so subtly. where breaking that space is so easy and we can not let it happen.

For children playing on the ground is fun, not just your child, my son also likes to play on the ground. All the kids here love to play on the ground and that's better than letting them play on the streets.. 😊

yes your are right there must be a delicate balance of yes and no , as with most children more you say no , the more there will push you , but sadly that does not change when there turn 17 , which me and hubby only know too well : /

@brian.rrr, Great dads are not those who are able to obey all the needs of the child materially. However, they are able to make children feel comfortable and happy when with their father. :)

I appreciate your logical thoughts. Really we have some responsibility to rise our children and if we properly complete our responsibility then our child will be a good man. Your son Jacob is really a lovely boy as i hope he will be a great man.🎓🎓🎓

I completely agree with picking your battles. As my girls have gotten older, I am also very careful before I say no. I say maybe a lot (then I think about their request and then I answer). I never go back on my NOs. Then they know I am firm.

I have two teenage daughters and I also like to write about family life often with humour. Feel free to visit my blog so you can see what future parenting may look like.

Really we have some responsibility to rise our children and if we properly complete our responsibility then our child will be a good man.

Many things that you say my father says, the truth is very right.

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