Satirically Yours New correspondent @aggroed talks to digital kitten vendor Vitalik Buterin

While walking the streets of NYC on a busy friday afternoon I was able to catch up with legendary digital kitten vendor Vitalik Buterin while he was handing out free Lambos and digital cats.

@aggroed- Excuse me Vitalik?

Vitalik- Yes?

@aggroed- You're the digital cat guy right?

Vitalik- Well, no, I'm the founder of the Ethereum blockchain.

@aggroed- Oh, but you're the guy selling the cats?

Vitalik - No, that's cryptokittens. One just sold for $125k USD you know...

@aggroed- Right, but those are on your network?

Vitalik - Yes, there are many of them and they are everywhere.

@aggroed - great. So, you'll have to do. How's the kitten business?

Vitalik - Well, I'll tell you, it's so popular that it's actually cause slight problems in the Ethereum network.

@aggroed - How so?

Vitalik - Well, Ethereum can only handle so many transactions per day. Actually we're at max capacity already. We have on the office white board a new term: KPS. It stands for kittens per second, and right now we're maxed out at our kitten capacity. So every transaction going forward is going to get more expensive and you'll need more gas to actually get things through faster, but even with that we can't keep up with these fucking cats. I'm nervous where this is going with even more kittens coming from the digital factory.

@aggroed- How is this going to effect my kitten investments? I'm planning on trading roughly 8000 kittens a day myself.

Vitalik - Well, you must have already seen the tweet by crypto kittens that the price is going up to even get them. I think the price will have to keep rising, because if they leave the price as $25 USD it will make our network crawl. Like a little itty bitty cute and cudly kitten.

@aggroed - just how big of a deal is this?

Vitalik. Well did you see this recent tweet?

These cats make up 25% of all network transactions right now. For the moment I'm happy, but sometimes I do wonder what will happen if crypto dogs comes along. I mean, we're over capacity as it is. The network literally can't handle this many transaction already. cryptodog, cryptosloths, cryptomilfs... as they expand this business we have literally no transactional room to expand.... fuck... I should probably call that asshole @dan to figure out what to do.

@aggroed - Oh, I saw a recent price trend. How do you think investors are responding.

Vitalik- Go fuck yourself.

@aggroed - I take it no free Lambos for me today?

For whatever reason the interview ended abruptly, but rest assured more cats are coming and the world waits for ethereum's solution to it.

Photo source: https://steemit.com/crypto/@agacc/funny-vitalik-photos-memes-compilation thanks @agacc