CREEPYPASTA Mr.Loop

in #creepypasta7 years ago

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I was only 12 years old when I encountered Mr.Loop. The year is 2007 Im 11 years old im about to leave 5th grade 5th grade was fun and all but sometimes i would hate it because I would always get in trouble for no reason because my friend would always blame stuff on me and that's not all of i would always get bullied picked on get called names and kids would always steal my lunch and it kinda felt like a loop for a year and i would always tell my mom and dad can i go back to my old school with my old friends but they would always say no.Finally 5th grade was over now.

Now i can tell you guys all the weird stuff that was going on at my middle school. Finally first day of middle school everything was going smoothly I was starting to make friends and everything was going perfectly I thought middle school was going to be alright for a year.But that all changed when i was a year ahead of school when other kids like me and they would go into the principle office but you see everytime a kid leaves the principles office they would always say its a loop and I always thought that was werid and my friends would always say try not to go into the principle office because he thinks i would say that I always thought that was creepy.A new day of school.

I did something really bad this morning i was in a fight with one of the kids that came out from the principle office and I was sent to the principle office and i said to myself oh no am i going to say it now i was in there was a principle named Mr.Loop since his last name was loop he said to me how did you get in this fight so i said he kept saying Mr.Loop is coming for you so i got angry and i punched him and he started fighting back so we got in fight. Then the principle said who is Mr.Loop and i said it was you. Then he got up and said follow me the principle said watch these films one film was a boy throwing body's into the river and said mr.loop the second one was a kid murdering people and said Mr.Loop then he stoped the films and said go to sleep. I woke up at my house and i saw a bump on my head and at the door it said Mr.Loop

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The story itself is kind of good.But you seriously need to work on your grammar.
Another tip is that you can read more creepypasta's that are more popular and get the touch how to write them and build them up to the point it excites people.

Thank you for the feedback ill work on my grammar next time i write a story like this and this is also my first creepypasta i plan on doing more for the future and I got alot to work on if im going to write another creepypasta like this again thanks for the feedback.

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