Set aside your ego and move forward - Learn from the mistakes of the people that you follow!

in #courage8 years ago (edited)


The best way to begin this post is, to start with people I follow since I joined here on Steemit. The first people that I started to follow were @heiditravels , @fyrstikken  , @tuck-fheman and more others, but I want to stick with them on this post.

I started to follow @heiditravels for her bravery to go on travels in different places and meeting new people. Two months ago, when I saw her first post she was in Africa, it was a pleasure when I saw what she is capable of doing, and I couldn't believe how many people get involved in supporting her. 

How many of us have the courage to kiss a cobra? She had that courage and I like it. There are people who never leave their stat, so, how many were on another continent like Africa?

But... 

What I want to see is if she has the courage to admit that, she was wrong by doing that to @fyrstikken. I don't want to bring back the misunderstanding between them, but she changes @fyrstikken future!

How she change @fyrstikken future

@fyrstikken and people like him, when they make a plan, behind that plan, are more others plans, they are like chess players or pro poker players. When she didn't show up to that meeting, she canceled @fyrstikken's plans and pulled him back few steps.

It cost him money for doing that plan, and the most important thing was that it cost him time. So when he said that bad words about Heidi it wasn't because it cost him money, it was because it cost him time, and maybe for @fyrstikken Time is Priceless. You can't put a price on someone's time, that's for sure, or at least for people who really believes that Time is Everything we really have in this life! 

I can agree with this; she saw a better opportunity by going somewhere else, but, she have to be aware that will be consequences when you cancel your Word without saying anything. For some people your Word means Everything and you can't change that. Do you have the courage to admit it @heiditravels?

Were @fyrstikken wrong by saying those bad words about @heiditravels?

But, first I want to tell you how I start to follow @fyrstikken. After I joined Steemit, it crossed my mind it will be a great idea, what if I start to do cartoons to bring smile on the people's faces. It was already too late for me because @fyrstikken was great on doing that. I wanted to try doing it anyway and I asked him to do me a favor if he has time to take a look at my post.

The surprise for me was; he didn't think for a second and he said YES. If a person is willing to take from his time to help a stranger, that person is a great one. You can think what you want but, I don't think, I know he is a great person! Let's go forward!

Yes, it was wrong because if you say bad words to someone can affect him in a negative way, and you can't change that. In the moment you say something bad to a person, those words are forever inside that person, no matter what you will do next. You can say: I'm sorry or try to fix it, but you can't delete the words you said. You can change your future, but you can't change the past, and those words will stay there forever!

So you both had a good reason for what you have done and both reasons are Priceless. The Time and offending someone is priceless because you can't pay for them to change, it's impossible! Do you have the courage to admit it @fyrstikken?

What about @tuck-fheman 

@tuck-fheman had a great impact on me when I saw that, he is a successful person here at Steemit and he had time to take photos and he was very good on that. I don't know why did he stop. Maybe he will tell us or not, but I really miss that.

When @tuck-fheman said and I quote:

I'll say she should feel lucky that she allegedly missed an appointment with this stranger in a country she was visiting. 

and  

Yep, this guy deserves more support Steemit! Keep upvoting this sociopath!

You forgot something: @heiditravels's name means: She like to travel and she wants's to meet new people, and if you don't believe me, search for her posts, she will admit; This is what she loves to do! So even if @fyrstikken were a stranger she still would like to meet him anyway.

Calling him a sociopath! That's just rude, because you are creating in other people's mind something that might not be true, and people will start to have a bad impression of him, just because you said so, not because they know so. You might know him better than me but this doesn't make him a sociopath. 

I don't have to be the smartest person on the planet to know this; You can't fix what you said about him. 

Do you have the courage to admit it @tuck-fheman!


Why I'm doing this


  • I know that here are people who will upvote it without reading it 
  • I know that people will upvote it for an upvote
  • I know that here are people who will say; I'm doing it only to get the attention from the users I mentioned above, and maybe they will upvote it. Now, to be honest this is true, I want their attention, but think about this: If @heiditravels and @fyrstikken will upvote this post I will have around 50 cents, and maybe if @tuck-fheman will upvote it too, maybe I will have between $1 - 100 or more, I don't really know it exactly. If you really read this post and you understood it, how do you know, how much cost, this time, I spend doing this post? Or how do you know they will see it? They are busy persons and for them, time is really precious! My time is also precious, and you don't know how precious it really is. This is a fact!
  • I know that here are people who love to read, and even if I said that I'm doing it for money or not when they finish it to read, they know what is the right thing to do ( flag, upvote, comment or nothing)
  • I admit this is the right way to do it: you read a post and if you like it, then you upvote it. I don't do it all the times, and it's a bad thing, because I encourage people who have bad content to keep doing it, but sometimes I'm doing it because maybe, this is what they want. Another upvote from someone else, might make that person happy at that moment, and I believe that is an amazing thing. The only thing you have to do is to click on a button, and Boom! You might make a person happy and this is what I love most about Steemit. The real problem about upvoting without reading a post, is that you don't know what you upvoted, and that person who felt the happiness at that moment, was too short. So, if you want to be happy here on Steemit for a long time, well, blind upvoting is not what you really want, my friend.

Conclusion



You might like this post or not, but the reason why I'm doing this post is because I really want to learn from people I follow. The best way to learn from people you like, is to learn from their mistakes. 

If somehow I offended you guys, I apologize in advance, but this is the way I see you, and for me, you are good people and I know it. 

For those who think otherwise, well...

I'm a piece of fuckin'white trash, I say it proudly 
Fuck this battle, I don't wanna win, I'm outtie
Here - tell these people something they don't know about me  -Eminem - 8 miles battle rap-

Source of photos : Pixabay

If you like it or you have any suggestions please comment below and don't forget to follow me!  

@the-future


Sort:  

On what level is your courage to admit that - You were wrong

I don't know, it's never come up!

Seriously though I hope everyone can make up, or at least agree to give each other space. Usually in a disagreement multiple people were wrong, as you've pointed out, and need to learn to set their ego aside and move forward. (Not me of course!)

I agree with you, and I believe it will be great if people will set their ego aside and move forward!

Yes, I have no problem admitting I used explicit words when I was mad at @heiditravels and for that I have already apologized in public and I´ll do it here again: "I am sorry Heidi for the words I used, please forgive me".

And @the-future you are right, there are more moves to the plan and it got interrupted - well read.

I knew that you will be the first person who will admit that. This is how a real person respond! I wasn't wrong when I said that, you are a great person and I will keep saying that.

I saw this drama unfolding, but I know there are always many sides to a story. Without chosing sides, here are some very good points in your post:
-time is precious
-your word is everything
-mainy of your predictions under why you are doing this are proving correct.

Yes, this is a big drama, but I hope will have a good final. If continues like this, people will have to choose one side or another, and this will be very bad for this platform.

Oh dear ! I never heard about this before.
That's why I just continue doing MY thing and look away when I see negativity not worth to feed into . I never followed Heidy because there are too many others who travel without making such "noise" and I rather support those . I appreciate healthy discussions but really do not like nasty attitude from a man to a woman and other way around

Yes, that's an another option, but sometimes you have to step in because in the long term it can affect you as well​!

I understand what you mean . So let's wait until both wear white steemit Tee's and make a post shaking hands . I bet they will cash in another few thousands 🙈 Just kidding . Drama over !

Yes indeed will be great what you said. I hope will end because they are smart people, and I believe the smartest will leave it first.

Wet T shirt contest please Hahaa

Do you have the courage to admit it @tuck-fheman!

so·ci·o·path (ˈsōsēōˌpaTH)
noun
a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience.

[09:14] (fyrstikken) COOPERATE OR I WILL PAY SOMEONE TO BEAT YOU TO DEATH!

[09:41] (fyrstikken) and if he dont solve it, he'll be knifed

Yes, I have the courage to admit he is, by definition, a sociopath.

Next question. ;)

Oh no 😭 Whatever the reason is for him to say such things . It's wrong ! Simply wrong . There should be kind ways to clear differences inbetween those 2 . Anger management much needed ! Apologies would be mature but words being thrown out can hurt and not easy to be forgotten.
I hope for forgiveness on all sides .

I agree with you in everything. Is wrong and he keeps doing it!

I decided to stop following them !

Now they should try to bring you back :)!

Tuck you admit something that we already saw many times from you. Anyway, the next questions: Do you have the courage to admit you were wrong calling him a sociopath? Or you just keep repeating your story!

Nope. He's a sociopath.

Why would I say that I'm wrong for pointing out a sociopath among us? That makes no sense. If he was an elephant in the room (lulz), you'd be asking me to take back the fact that I'm saying "there's an elephant in the room!".

Come on man, stop trying to profit off of a situation you claim to want to just go away.

Saying that "there's an elephant in the room!" is one thing but saying that "there's a sociopath elephant in the room!" is just rude.
@fyrstikken is a person and he has feelings like everyone on this planet. You might hurt or not, his feelings.
It seems that you know everything, even why I'm doing this( to profit off of this situation). I meet people like you who believes that they always right, but that is just an illusion in your mind.
Tell me please; why did you choose that name (lulz) for the elephant? Did you ask if (lulz) likes that name?
Oh, sorry I forgot you know everything! My bad, I apologize. If you keep saying that he is a sociopath it won't​ make him one.
At least admit that you can't admit you were wrong! You forgot to push the stop button.

I'm sorry to hear that you support people that make death threats, post libelous material, verbally abuse women and flag new users and call them assholes before any sort of rational discussion.

That's unfortunate. But I'll mute people like you to save myself some time.

maybe a little irrelevant. but the Chinese character in your picture: 英 ... doesn't mean courage as far as I know. It could mean: elite, blossom, essence, outstanding, extraordinary... but not courage. Instead you should use 勇. sorry for the distraction!

I didn't know that and it wasn't a distraction at all. Thanks a lot for the feedback.

was heidi in the wrong I don't know, was there any solid contract or agreement i don't know. But even if there was the public lashing, name calling and outright abuse was compleatly uncalled for. I'm sure I'm not the only user who has stopped following him because of it.
I for one am glad we have powerful users such as tuck calling out abuse when they see it,

You might be right but think about this: Let's just say you want to invest some money into steem. You believe steem has a great potential to grow and you can make good money right?
If somebody says to you before to invest into steem there is a possibility​ that someone can flag your post and you can't make money , you will think otherwise.​
He can find lots of arguments why he flags​ your content and is nothing you can do.
Until you realize that someone flagged your post you will lose a lot of money. So, something must be done to avoid this thing, and to stop the fights between users. This will affect all of us.

I don't think there will ever be a way to stop users falling out after all community is one of the largest aspects of the site and a community is made up of many users who will not always get along with each other.
If those disagreements are spilling out into the platform with one user abusing another and riling people up to take sides, then yes members of the community should step in as it reflects badly on us all for letting it happen.
we all have a vested interest in this site and allowing users to openly be abusive by going unchallanged will put off those visiting the site and thinking of signing up which in the long run hurts everyones earnings far much more than the person who believes investing money gives them the right to behave in an abusive fashion.
note I'm no longer talking about this one instance but more in general as I highly doubt this is the last time we will see drama llama's airing their dirty laundry so publically on the site.

If is not a friendly platform then people will get tired of seeing lots of flags around​ and they will leave. They just need to find a way to stop the abuse for real.

I agree with you there, this situation and some of the responses to @stellabelle 's questionaire show that the current system is far from ideal and clearly needs addressing while we are still in beta.

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.25
TRX 0.21
JST 0.037
BTC 98282.96
ETH 3475.43
USDT 1.00
SBD 3.41