Probably you can call me a contrarian

I developed that early in my life.

Being a contrarian feels like freedom from whatever we don't like, if we do the oposit. At least it felt like freedom when I was young.

It's not. What or who we don't like still determines, what we do. (The oposit)

Freedom starts when we are a contrarian but have no problem to learn from those we can't stand and sometimes to do what they do.