As it was written, so shall it be done….said the mighty @papa-pepper, master of the Selfie Challenge, as he leveled our next challenge. Ever the lover of watching people run like chickens with their head cut off, he dropped the challenge like a bomb…..and watched it EXPLODE. The challenge laid down by Master Pepper was:
"Show some water being dumped on your head"
As always chaos at the many households of the contestants ensued. Some running outside, others to their showers, many to the sink….ALL seeking that most elusive of prizes, the “QUICK DRAW.” This day is was @dearjoyce who was the victorious speedster, LITERALLY RUNNING to the sink, at great risk to herself. But the brave never falter.
Alas, I was not even in the running (see what I did there) this day, as life conspired against my steemit quest. As ever, once the quick draw is lost…it’s time to put on the thinking cap. One must go deep into one’s mind to seek the perfect idea, and as my mother used to say about my ideas “keep them, they’re in a very strange place.” If only she knew how right she was.
So began my meditation, my inner child seeking out a glimmer of cool, a pinch of funny…..what was it to be. There were already any number of shower shots, kitchen sink wetdowns, and a few outdoor drenchings….what to do. Then it hit me, that it should hit me. To explain, while people slipping on ice is painful, we always laugh. No one wants to get slapped, but we love it when Moe does it to Curly. Slapstick then, or as close as I thought I could get, would be my battle cry. I needed a LOT of water to hammer me at one time.
Once I figured that out, it was time to set the shot and gather the props I would need to make it happen. First I needed something that could hold a lot of water, but had a bigger than normal opening to allow a lot out at once. After a bit of cogitation I remember that I had several GI 5 gallon water cans in one of my storage containers. Good to go.
Now I could just dump the water on my head, as the challenge required…..but where’s the fun in that, why not add a few props. So I went to my scuba locker and fished out (see what I did again) some old gear. Namely a scuba mask & snorkel. Now it’s starting to come together.
But was it complete? I felt not….there just seemed to be something missing. Hmmmm……AHA
NOW we were cooking with gas. I just throw that stuff on, get my camera set up, and pour water on my head, wait…..HOW IN THE HELL AM I GOING TO GET THAT HEAVY ASS CAN ABOVE MY HEAD. Clearly I had been so consumed with the look and which camera I was going to use that I forgot to figure that part out. The best laid plans of mice and aqua-men as it were.
After a bit more cogitation, I decided a “location scout” was in order on the property. So I went a lookin’ high and low….but mostly high. Suddenly, there it was. My washer & dryer happen to be outside, in a small covered alcove. While the roof of the house was problematic, the little roof over the washer was, as the baby bear said….”just right.” Almost
It did require one more piece of equipment, namely a stepladder. No biggie. I did a quick test with a little water and it looked good, other than the can falling off the roof once there was no water in it. But we must be prepared to suffer for out art. A water can to the head is a small price to pay for eternal steemit glory.
But it did reveal a flaw in my plan. I had planned on using the Canon camera with a remote, since I could zoom it to keep it away from the water and shoot to stop the water. Problem was….the remote ain’t water proof. Hmmmm, guess I better use the gopro since it’s waterproof. It has a 30 pics per second setting that is great for stopping fast movement, like hummingbirds or in this case falling water. Case solved….or so I thought. With all the cool settings gopro’s have, what they DO NOT HAVE is a timer setting. W-T-F….udge. The thing is all about filming yourself, but no timer??? It does have a remote though….that is just as unwaterproof as the one for my Canon. I am now getting perturbed. Really the camera has way better settings for stopping motion and it does have a timer, but I’m not sure I can run all the way back in time, hop up on the step ladder, open the big lid on the can, and hop down into position with the right timing. Yeah verily, I am vexed.
But then…..I hearkened back to my military days, when we would live for weeks on end out of rucksacks regardless of how hard it was raining. Before we would head out, we would waterproof EVERYTHING. Nothing like a Ziploc bag to get a brother back on track. With everything in place I filled the can, put it up on the roof, and did a final focus. It was time.
I pulled on my trusty mask & snorkel, hopped up onto the step ladder, got my finger over the button, and unscrewed the cap. That’s where it speeds up. That can was gonna empty fairly fast so as soon as I got the cap off I hit the button as I leapt off the ladder (it was set to keep taking pics continuous for 10 seconds) and shoved the controller in my pocket. Having hit ground I jumped under the thundering water.
POW….got socked in the noggin as the water hit me. Heroically I fought the massive water pressure (over the top? Nahhhhh) as it strove to annihilate me. Bravely I brought up my pepper in search of the elusive “bonus shot”
AND THEN….it was over. The water, finished with its vicious assault, became naught but a trickle. The moment had passed and all was well, UNTIL…that damn can came off the roof and tried to take me out. But as mentioned earlier, I was ready for it. Deftly I sidestepped with the grace of…..well the grace of a rhino on Quaaludes since I had forgotten about it falling off during the test. But even so….the rhino made it out of the way and the mission was complete, or was it???
Now it was time to see if it had paid off, if the mission was successful, had all the planning worked, did I have any more sour patch candy….sorry, I digress. So off I went with SD card in hand to the computer to see if I had magic. Well….dunno how magical it was, but I did “git er done.”
Once again the day was done and only barely in time to submit. But a true warrior never surrenders and fights through adversity….like falling water cans and no sour candy. Submission complete, I commiserated with my fellow selfie adventurers and glad tidings were had by all.
Now we await the next dastardly challenge to be leveled by the one known as pepper. Give us your best challenge….we ARE NOT afraid, not the knights of the selfie.