After the parade Poem

I ran into this instagram ad "submit your poem and win 5,000 dollar prize" the poem is reflecting the world and my place in it, gay pride specially. I tried to join the challenge only to find out I have to pay 50 dollars to join, so starving artist couldn't pay 50 dollars and here is my poem.

PRIDE 2022

June 2022 and I'm on my way to NY
it is the morning of june 23 and the airport of mexico city is busy as usual
I'm feeling very different from what I felt before it is also very early
I made my way to the airport gate to wait for my flight
As I sat down I began to notice all the beautiful and fashionable gay men at my door
NY is going to be fun I thought to myself, I'm the hopeless romantic but also the "I love men bodies"

I arrived for the first time in my life to NY, how I'm going to make it home, I wondered
First to the upper west side to stay with my lovely friend Anna
and then to my lovely home in the American Academy of Dramatic Arts
The subway I thought, the fact that I never been in NY won't stop me, I've been around

As I made my way to the subway I notice one cute couple from the airport in Mexico
they were both very gay and very kind, they help get to the upper west side
they are my people type: gay and good hearts.

On our way to the subway they told me why they were here, it was the gay pride
they told me all about their plans, gay orgies, wet parties and so much festivities I couldn't wait to say no
oh my god I though, I was escaping from that in Spain which I never loved, the circuit parties, the excess and the drugs.. Now I'm too old, if that means being gay, oh then I'm not

¿Can I just find a man who likes men and wants to fall in love?

One thing is being gay and from a small-closed minded city like the one where I'm from
another one is trying to fit in in the gay world, oh my god is just exhausting
feels like high school all over again: drama, trauma, fear, envy, fakeness, excesss, restless

I realized something that day, which only in a city like New York could see
everything and everywhere is just the same, not matter the culture, sex or preferences
everybody, everywhere is just fucking depressed
I do no fit in the gay world, I do no fit in any world
I only fit with humanity and love.