_{To be confident is to be happy and carefree}

How the lack of confidence affects me

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The lack of confidence puts us in a limbo. That feeling of uneasiness where we want to do something but a negative force within us seems to pull us away from it. Mind influenced by hesistation gets drenched of never ending what ifs and should haves.

Solutions to problems don't easily get discovered since we are not confident to seek help. We are misunderstood because of our timidness to express or defend ourselves. We haven't lived our dream life since we are hesitant to take risks.

These are just some repercussions we get with the lack confidence. It could be as simple as not being able to get an extra cup of rice since you're just to shy to ask from the waiter or as big as missing the opportunity because of extreme nervousness during a job interview.

The Confidence Project

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When @thegaillery first posted the Confidence Project's First Takeaway, I immediately thought about what aspects in my life I wanted to improve my confidence on. However, I got tied up with other priorities and this post was put on hold. Good thing I was able to grasp more control of my time now when @jsmalila posted the second takeaway of the Confidence Project. My post will be a fusion of the two takeaways - 1) Identify your area of focus and 2) Establish your motivation.

Area of focus: SELF-EXPRESSION

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One area of focus that I would want to have confidence is SELF-EXPRESSION. There are times or most of the time, I haven't shared to people accurately what I really feel. Maybe because I was too timid or I just don't have enough words or ways to express my innermost thought. People wouldn't know if I am angry, sad or I was just being serious when my brows meet. I also have a monotonous voice where some don't take me seriously when I get mad.

Things I Pledge to do

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• LEARN. To gain confidence in self-expression, I will read more books and watch videos to help me get rid of my monotone voice. Enriching my vocabulary is also a way to be more accurate on sharing my thoughts on something.

• PROACTIVE. At least once in while, I will involve in conversations that I am much familiar with or something that I could be a help. The more I become comfortable with having conversations, the least I get conscious on sharing my ideas.

• BE INSENSITIVE. It's not that I will no longer mind people's feeling when I tell them my thoughts. I will still tell them the reality but in a subtle way. Since I was too conscious of what might people think of me, I should be less anxious of it. As long as my gut tells me that what I will be sharing is the right thing to do, I should do it.

Motivations

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For everything we do, we always have those motivations to keep us going, be it intrinsic or extrinsic.

Intrinsic Motivation

As mentioned by @jsmalila on the second takeaway,

Intrinsic motivation pertains to the willingness of a person in doing something because that person has an innate interest in the nature of the activity that he or she is doing.

This could be a something that brings satisfaction to one's desire or happiness.

I am aiming to be more expressive on my thoughts so that I can be relieved and less anxious on my untold views. I will not be overthinking on what should have happened if I told him/her this.

Extrinsic Motivation

Based on @jsmalila's post,

Extrinsic motivation, on one hand, pertains to the willingness of a person in doing something because a person is anticipating an outcome in a form of either a tangible or intangible thing.

Since I will be more honest and proactive, I am aiming to gain more friends or social connections. They will hopefully help me with my future endeavors.

Final words...

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I am thankful for this project for giving me a guide to be confident in the area of focus that I chose. Kudos to the team who made this project possible. It is up to me now to be consistent and persistent with what I pledged to do.

Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong. -Peter T. McIntyre

Love lots,

@wandergirl ❤