COMEDY OPENMIC ROUND 16 | A DIALOGUE ON DISCORD
I am in a very bad mood today. I don't think I can be funny if I tried, the way I feel now. Well here's my entry for Comedy Open Mic round 16
ACT ONE, SCENE ONE
Fade in
Somewhere on Discord. It is late, network is bad and battery is low. A ping; a new message.
Steemingnaija: Good evening sir
Warpedpoetic: Don't call me sir, it makes me feel old.
silence
Steemingnaija: Okay, I want you to check out my post and upvote me. I will upvote you back.
Warpedpoetic: I don't want you to do anything to my back. I like my back just the way it is.
Steemingnaija: lol. You are funny.
Warpedpoetic: No I am not. I am warpedpoetic. My name is there in front of you. Do you need glasses?
Steemingnaija: No... I mean you make me laugh.
Warpedpoetic: Well English is my second language so I do not get meanings. Maybe if you said it instead of meaning it, I will get it.
silence
Steemingnaija: Will you upvote me?
Warpedpoetic: I will look at Me's account and if Me writes good stuff, I will do the needful.
Steemingnaija: lol. Thank you. Should I drop my link?
Warpedpoetic: link to what?
Steemingnaija: To my posts?
Warpedpoetic: How many posts am I supposed to look at. There's Me and now we have My. Make up your mind bro.
Steemingnaija: No, I mean the post I want you to check out for me.
Warpedpoetic: oh Me's post. That's fine. Drop it please. Why did you not just say so instead of bringing My into the matter?
Steemingnaija: jeez, you're weird and funny. Lol
Warpedpoetic: So I am warpedpoetic, weird and funny right? You just stated that I have multiple personalities? You don't even know me. 😖
Steemingnaija: No I meant that the way you chat is weird and it is also funny.
Warpedpoetic: I have different chatting styles?🤔
Steemingnaija: No, I am not saying that.
Warpedpoetic: What are you saying then?
silence
Steemingnaija: Where are you from?
Warpedpoetic: I don't know where they are from? Why don't you ask them?
Steemingnaija: God!
Warpedpoetic: You want to ask him too? That's even better.
Steemingnaija: I don't know what to say.
Warpedpoetic: I understand. People get like that around me.
Steemingnaija: Are you always like this?
Warpedpoetic: Only when I am irritated and hungry.
Steemingnaija: Wow! You should go and eat then.
Warpedpoetic: I find that statement reprehensible, caustic, insulting, preposterous, thoughtless, upsetting and etcetera etcetera...
Steemingnaija: What did I say?
Warpedpoetic: You just told me that I do not know when to eat. Are you my father or mother? I reject that fallacy, I find your actions unacceptable and a taint on my image as someone who eats when he is hungry.
silence
Steemingnaija: I don't understand.
Warpedpoetic: They never do.
Steemingnaija: I am sorry if I have offended you.
Warpedpoetic: well that's good for You then. You will be happy for your apology while I, the malcontented party, the falsely accused,the victim of man's verbosity will slink home broken.
silence
Warpedpoetic: hehehehe, don't mind me bro, I will check out the post. But don't slide into people's dm like this again.
Steemingnaija: lol, I won't do so again sir. Thank you sir.
Warpedpoetic: Sir has died. It is just me remaining in the family. I have got to go. Stay safe.
Fade out.
Most times, they still come back again. Humans are weird and funny, they never learn.
Hahaha . Best reply yet.
Dude would be wondering if you're warped or mad
He should have realised from my name that he was in warped zone 😂
few thing provide me more joy than messing with spammers.... well played sir, err mr. err poet of war umm warped
war poet, if you may, em err, Mr shitcoins
I seem to forget nominating for the contest. Something is definitely wrong with my head. I nominate @aschatria and @djoi to join the comedy open mic contest. Let's see if you'd make us laugh. I dare you.
@idikuci he did
I really look forward to seeing theirs🤣🤣....
Where can i read more of things like that, pls?
You can use the tag #comedyopenmic to search for more fun posts or you can join the community and coming on the discord server by clicking here
You no go leave me ba? Challenge accepted.
This is crazy mad😂😂....i'll like to be in this mood sometime.
Oh I am in this mood all the time.
Sure you are....everything sounds so effortless....
😂 it is never effortless bro
*Sis 😊
Lol. The funny thing about this post is that I actually see you doing this.
Lmho. I pity the person.
Warped human being.
No I am not like that na. 😂
Your post has been upvoted by the @steemiansarens. Our goal is to support minnows and help them grow. You can join our discord server here Whastapp here.. You can also support us by either contributing steem or delegating SP to us
speechless
Now I'm afraid of you.
😂 I am a kindhearted douche, didn't you see? Read up bro.
I could feel steemingnaija's confusion and nervous tension, too (if this actually happened in real life). Glad I never DM'd anybody for upvotes, I might experience the same thing. That's nerve-racking!!!! Hahaha...
Yeah @evlachsblog, I have never either. I think that's one of the first lessons Iearnt, when I joined the platform. Never Beg for Upvotes.
I have actually reacted to one or two uninvited guests. 😂 I am cruel, I know. I do it to mostly friends though.
Well, I didn't learn it. I was just embarrassed to ask, so I never asked anyone. If someone DMs me asking me if they can drop the link and then we exchange upvotes, I just say, "sure". But never that I initiated.
OK. I don't even exchange upvotes. When i joined newly, they were guys who welcomed my links but after a while I stopped because it began to feel like I was imposing. There were also some folks I already knew who I upvoted and they upvoted me too but I stopped it all after a while. We were slowly starting to seem like circle jerking planktons and it made no sense.
I prefer whoever to spend sometime pretending to get to know me before slamming me with upvote me.
You have a good point. I actually thought of that, but as a beginner, the upvotes meant something to me. But lately, when someone DMs and asks for an upvote, I say, that my voting power is low and doesn't have any value at all. I've only just recently learnt about voting power and my VP has always been pretty low, so I limit my upvoting. I leave sensible comments instead.
yeah you start to feel a sense of obligation and even when you do not feel like upvoting their posts because it is a shitpost, you have no choice because they have upvoted your own post too
Yeah, I don't like that feeling, when I'm forced to do something out of compulsion, just because someone did a favour to me, no matter how big or small that was.
Lol so you're basically a kindhearted douche.
It would seem so, wouldn't it?
LOL