Spider On The Hose (COM #29 Entry)

in comedyopenmic •  2 months ago

Saturday spider photostory anyone?
Today I didn't only play with my camera, I also played with some lyrics...

Enjoy! 🕷🕸


Spider on the hose

Spider on the hose


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 5.jpg


Upwards this hose she crawls

In holes she sticks her nose


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 1.jpg


Like a huntress on her own

She's a queen without a throne

Spider on the hose


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 10.jpg


There's a killer on the hose

All her eyes will never close


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 3.jpg


Come on and make her day

Sweet insects you will pay


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 2.jpg


If you wave and say hi

Insect family will die

Killer on the hose


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 6.jpg


Insect girls protect your man

Insect girls protect your man

Take him by the hand

Make him understand

If you get caught on her hands

Your life will reach the end

Girls protect your man


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 9.jpg


Spider on the hose

Spider on the hose

Upwards this hose she crawls


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 4.jpg


In holes she sticks her nose

Like a huntress on her own

She's a queen without a throne


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 7.jpg


Spider on the hose

Spider on the hose

Spider on the hose

Spider on the hose

Spider on the hose


ruth-girl_steemit_spider on the hose 8.jpg



Into this house we're born
Into this world we're thrown

Riders on the storm...



*All images (not free for re-use) and story by @ruth-girl - Steemit, 2018



I hope you enjoyed this little messed up song and the cool pictures (not the best I could get, I know), which serve an entry to the new round of the @comedyopenmic contest - Comedy Open Mic Comedy Contest - Round 29 !!

I shall be nominating @mariossap and @mathowl to join in the pun... ehm, fun! Guys? Are you in?

Thank you so much for your time!

Until my next post,
Steem on and keep smiling, people!


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Hi ruth-girl,

Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)

Judges:

If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here

Click To Vote @ComedyOpenMic For Witness And Disrupt The Steem Blockchain With Laughter!
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Thank you to @matytan for the great banner

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Thanks a lot @com-judge! I'll be waiting for the "verdict" εναγωνίως...

cool spider great zoom in the photos

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Spider on the hose
Now I feel so froze
Not 1, not 2, not 3 toes
Spider has 8 of those
I faint as the spider gets close
Now I'm one of the spider's hoes

Nice post, Ruth. Thanks for entering the comedy open mic. Nice photos. Finally someone admits that a picture isn't worth a thousand words and decided to write some ;)

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Ahahahahaha! I loved that poem!

Thank you for the thumbs-up! 🤩

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spider likes hoes too much though

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Not sexier than you!

in holes she sticks her nose

ελα ρε ruthie....γραφει και ο αλλος αντι για Hose να το διαβασουμε hoes.... ε το καναμε ακαταλληλο για ανηλικους το θεμα!!!
...καλουτσικες οι φωτο!!!

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Αααα, δε φταιω εγω για τα βρωμιακ μυαλα του steemit, μια πλακα πηγα να κανω...

Δεν μου πολυαρεσαν να σου πω, ηταν μολις ειχα πρωτοπαρει τα close-up φιλτρα, οποτε παλευα να τα μαθω, κουνιοταν κι η αραχνη συνεχως, δεν μπορουσα να σταυρωσω μια καλη ποζα! Ανεβαζω κ αντιγραφο της εικονας σε χαμηλη ποιοτητα, για να μην τρωω πολλη ωρα στο ανεβασμα, οποτε μου κανει πολυ τσαπατσουλοδουλεια, αλλα ηθελα να μοιραστω την ολη συνθεση...

That's a fuck no spider from the species, burn the house down and start over.

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Oh, she's a big girl! Thank God we found her in the garden and not in the house... I'd have to move out! :P

I loved it. I am always a sucker for anything music related. It is great to see you over in COM also.

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Thanks! I love messing with lyrics ever since I was a kid in primary school.
Too bad you don't know Greek... you'd enjoy my dirty lyrics on popular Greek songs.

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Maybe I will have to teach myself greek. I really want to learn another language. I was going to try Spanish since a lot of people speak Spanish anymore.

Mia mera , kapoia apo tis araxnes montela sou , tha tsimpisei ton @trumpman kai meta tha mas to paizei spiderman...

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Ωωωωωχ, τον φανταζομαι να απλωνει ιστους σε ολο το σπιτι προσπαθωντας να πιασει μπυρες απο το ψυγειο... Θα τις κοψω τις αραχνες, θα αρχισω να φωτογραφιζω μονο τοπια μου φαινεται!

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To xeirotero tha einai na perpataei sto tabani kai na anoigei tis mpures oso tha einai upsidedown ! xD

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Ωχ Παναγια μου!

I knew the tune before I knew it was the tune you chose. Good job!

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Oh thank you!

Funny thing I imagined that song when reading your lyrics before seeing you had put it

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That's why I left the song for the end! I wanted people to see if they guessed right!

Hi @ruth-girl!

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Oh, I love this. You have the patience of a spider to catch this drama! I didn't get the Riders on the Storm association (I can be very dim), but still loved the lyrics--perfect for the pictures.

In holes she sticks her nose
Like a hunter on her own
She's a queen without a throne

The photos are brilliant--close up of eyes and legs, and then the creeping back under cover to hunt another day. I'm waiting to upvote because my power's down--then I'll post this comment. Enthusiasm got the best of me, so I had to write my thoughts after reading.

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Thank you for the encouraging feedback (truth is I'm not very fond of all the shots here, but the spider was moving all the time and I couldn't get a clear shot easily - close-up filters are tricky on the focus function)!

PS: Don't worry about upvoting, I appreciate it that you stopped by and gave it a read @agmoore! :D

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I have to tell you, I don't know anything about photography, and very little about popular music. But I read, read, read, and know when something is clever. This was very clever.
Can't believe that spider wouldn't stand still for you :)

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Oooh, thank you for the compliment @agmoore! I'm blushing 🤭

If you read "hose" as hoes, the poem is twice juicy

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Ahahahahaha! I did! And cried!🤣🤣