Delegated Proof of Dick (Comedy Open Mic #20)

The wars are not going away. Doesn't matter what the media is selling to you as the latest state of affairs between Kim Jong Un and Donald Trump nor the fact that BernieSanders has gone 30 full days, one moon cycle without mentioning Haejin.

The tension is and will always be there. All for what? Power. Some metric set up by the early harbingers of planet earth few years after a serpent tricked a naked woman into eating an apple instead of a cucumber.

Stone, brass, silver, gold, we've been there. Nowadays it's the dollar bill and a cryptographic version of it awaiting its fate from the whims and caprices of bespectacled nerds and what is left of their PCs after jerking off and for Steemit.com, a certain young man based in Texas Austin who is making this platform more valuable by powering down his account.

The word around has been "what a dick," "that was a dick move"; which is sad considering the fact that people are pronouncing the very thing that will bring all these hassles to an end once and for all: dick.

Enough of these world order upon world order algorithms. Endless search for equality and universal basic income. Let us please employ the natural, straight and to the point formula: the dick-algorithm.

Away with the fiat, away with the cryptos. Set them ablaze and let us ride with the straight forward wield locked in our pants: the dick itself, in its fullness when stroked and glory when jizzed.

Do you have a dollar or a million of it? Is your Steemit wallet that of a church rat or the size of the pastor's pocket responsible for the church rat's misery?

Arise and shine I pray thee. Head over to the newly launched Decentralized Dick Exchange (DDE). Get rid of those atrocities you call money: both fiat and crypto. Exchange them for inches of dick and await the launch of our mainnet: dickchain.io.

Fret not by the size of your wallet. We have a unicorn move which is the cherry of this whole movement: The Delegated Proof of Dick (DPOD).

Right after converting your life savings to dick-inches (dinches), operating on the DDE conversion rate of 1 inch dick to every 1 million dollars (or its equivalent in ETH and BTC) @freedom for example will end up with 13 inches of dick while @acolucky will find himself wielding a miserly 0.002 inches of dick.

The conversion rate may be great but the implementation is a cause for concern.

For this reason, the Delegated Proof of Dick was made.

In order to keep the dickchain running without freezing, no one dick must be longer than the other. Hence the reason for the Delegated Proof of Dick concept. The distribution model rests on the immortal words: "let's make dicks of all nations."

In this system, the Bernie and Haejin war won’t be a thing because Berniesanders will have to delegate his extra dick-inches to Haejin until they both have the same amount of dinches.

That doesn't mean we will force anyone to delegate a protruded part of his private rod. Instead, we have a perfect behavioral model that allows him to face the consequence of any action he chooses to take.

The law says: “thou shalt not possess a dick lengthier than thy neighbor's,” but peradventure that happens, Section 29, paragraph 4 of the Dickchain's Code of Conduct which states that: "a person's dick shall remain at a stand still if he happens to be the cause of an uneven dick distribution until he does otherwise," will suffice. i.e. "delegate or remain powered-up aka standing erect".

This concept also makes flagging of bad actors easy. Should Jerry carry his snake oil business to run any scammy ICO other than providing the oil to stroke and service all dicks on the dickchain, every member the community will equally partake in the act of zipping down, whipping out their dicks and collectively flogging a sales man back to Florida. Much better than waiting for themarkymark and berniesanders to do the dirty job.

The applications of this concept is far and wide. Dick-envy from females for example will be a thing of the past. Just three clicks of a button and with the help of Dickconnect, @tamaralovelace can wield a dong of her own. And should @trafalgar prove stubborn to helping her out, she can purchase a dick delegation of her own from Dicktrades.

Sign up for dickchain.io today and let us get this dong of liberation going.

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_{I nominate @jerrybanfield to sprinkle his comedic talent on the COM tag before he “dashes” out of this community and also @infovore to convince AY to host his next AY Live show on DLive.}

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