OMG this is such a cool community!

I'm so stoked to be here on Steemit and it's great to meet you all!

Before I get too far into my awesome #introduceyourself post, here's a picture of me killin' it and chillin' like a cool cat covered in kitten gifs on Kit Carson Peak, which is 14,165 feet above sea level:

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Aww yeah! What a kickass view! Enhanced by yours truly, LOL!

You see that snowy mountain directly in the background? That's Challenger Point, which is 14,081 feet above sea level.

My name is Pinky, by the way! Pleased to meet you!

I got a new human recently. His name is Brandt and he seems like a pretty decent guy.

He bought me at a place called Community Threads in downtown Leadville, Colorado.

Community Threads is a great little consignment shop where you can get all kinds of neat and gently used clothing and gear.

Including ice axes like me!

Guess what? Brandt had never used an ice axe before he got me!

It's always kinda fun when you find your cold hard steel shaft in the uncorrupted amateur hands of a newbie.

The power! The possibilities!

Oh, what a good feeling it is!

LOL! I can already tell me and Brandt are really gonna get along, like cellmate besties!

Alright, let me tell you guys a little bit about myself now.

These are a few of my favorite things:

• Bright sunshiny winter days
• Luncheons on the banks of high alpine lakes
• All kinds of Colorado wildflowers (but especially the pink ones)
• The sparks that fly when the perfectly tapered edge of my slicked-up and super-sick pick hits a rock just right
• Glissading down snowy slopes and icy couloirs
• Ice (obviously, LOL)
• Mountains!

Mountains are so cool! I absolutely love them. Don't you?

Here's a picture of my new favorite mountains:

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Those are the Sangre de Cristo mountains! Those tall choppy-looking peaks up there on the right are the Crestones. And you can see Humboldt Peak in the background on the left.

Talk about breathtaking — even for an ice axe like me who's seen it all!

Me and Brandt just went to those mountains the other day.

I couldn't believe he picked the Sangre de Cristos as his first mountain range to use an ice axe in! Those are some sketchy routes out there, man! Even sketchier with all the snow and ice!

Good thing I was there so Brandt could swing me high and drive me deep to keep himself from falling off those steep slippery slopes. There's no way he'd be alive right now if it wasn't for me.

LOL!

Speaking of being alive, check out this guy!

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Look at him strolling down Kit Carson Avenue there.

Just enjoying life, soaking up the insane scenery.

All alone. All by himself way out in the middle of nowhere.

Totally oblivious to the fact that I'm right behind him, getting ready to give the order for my new human to bury my adze in the back of his head!

You couldn't have asked for more perfect conditions for murd—

Wait.

Something's wrong.

I can tell by your reaction that something is wrong.

What happened? I wonder what I did?

Maybe I omitted an important detail.

It wouldn't be the first time, I guess.

Hmm.

I wonder what I left out.

…

…

Oh!

Silly me!

I forgot to mention one of my favorite things!

Favorite things, cont'd:

• The sight of fresh brain matter and bloody bone fragments as my human pulls my adze out of the back of someone’s head

LOL!

So anyway, here's a picture of another guy I saw out there:

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It took a bit longer to catch up with this guy. He was fast.

But I'm really good at glissading down snowy slopes and icy couloirs, especially with a human like Brandt!

So eventually, after a bit of a chase, I was able to order my human to plunge my spike through the guy's torso and pin him to the side of the mountain!

Two in a single afternoon. Woooo! Good job, Pinky!

Talk about a successful Saturday!

Well, it was great to meet you all.

It seems like me and my human Brandt are shaping up to be a pretty great pair. I'm really looking forward to posting more blogs about murdering people in the mountains, and maybe some of my other favorite things, too.

Please upvote and follow me — I'll be sure to upvote and follow you back.

Thanks for reading, and don't forget:

My name is Pinky the Ice Axe.

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_{Here I am relaxing at my human's home after a long day of murdering people in the mountains.
You should come visit me sometime!
I love meeting new people!
It's one of my favorite things!}

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P.S. This has been an entry to Comedy Open Mic Round 4. I'm pretty sure I followed all the rules, but if not I apologize for being such a disappointment. I nominate @rkphoto and @themadgoat for the next round of #comedyopenmic. Sorry guys.

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Hello from the high Rockies of Colorado. My name is Brandt, pleased to meet you. (This is really Brandt talking now, not Pinky.) I’m a marketing copywriter. I live in a little ghost town called Leadville. If you like mountains, snow, jokes, ice axes, running, hiking, breathing, not working, etc., then you and I have a lot in common. (Still Brandt.) Thanks for stopping by, and have a lovely day! LOL!