Southold Report: In One Epic Line, Stephen Colbert Nails The 2020 Contest

in #colbert5 years ago

William Southold, The Southold Report

Steven Colbert’s main monologue target was Attorney General William Barr’s Senate testimony last night, but he saved his most cogent humor for the end. He accurately nailed the 2020 presidential election to come.

“My favorite Trump tweets are the ones he says - ‘How can they impeach the most successful president in history! The best economy ever! Everyone‘s favorite! No collusion! No obstruction!

Mr. President, I believe in the medical field, it’s called “symptoms”.

President Trump - meet our Chief of Psychiatry, Doc Pelosi. Assisting in surgery, Doc Schumer.

Doc Schumer, Trump went on a retweet storm the other day, retweeting over 100 tweets of his supporters. Further evidence of psychiatric concern?

(In the voice of Doc Schumer) No, I would look to constipation first, spending a lot of time on the toilet.”

There you have it, the 2020 election in a Colbert nutshell: Trump’s desperate cries for approval, his bizarre outrageous claims, some would say, “dangerous" behavior (a threat to self and others) all put on the Dem’s psychiatric couch.

It used to be, “it’s the economy, stupid”. Now it will be, “the best economy ever!” vs. “why don’t you lie down here, make yourself comfortable.”

Central News Service, proudly bringing you the fakest news anywhere, featuring our very own Pulitzer Prize winning Fake Newsman, William Southold

(CNS Disclaimer: Mr. Southold has in no way won the Pulitzer Prize.)

(CNS Disclaimer #2: Apparently Mr. Southold is now a “Fake Joke” curator. Will this never end?)
Colbert Monologue.png
(Screenshot of The Late Show)

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.20
TRX 0.15
JST 0.029
BTC 64572.94
ETH 2630.79
USDT 1.00
SBD 2.82