倾听的魅力 art of listening

有位前同事M跳巢去了一家公司当副总。听到很多人议论过她，说她也只是运气好，碰上是她以前老板在那个公司当老板，所以她才可以升级坐上那个位置。

I have an ex-colleague called M. She jumped to other company to take on a VP's role. I heard some people talking about her in the office. They said she was just lucky that the boss of that new company was her boss from previous job.

我前几天和M还有其他一些朋友吃了顿饭庆祝一位同事S的生日。当S到了以后大家都入席了，我看到M非常耐心地问S她现在的工作还有家人情况。而且在谈的时候，我注意到M一直都非常认真地倾听，而且不时还附上几句贴心话，并表示同理心。

Few days ago, I happened to go to a party to celebrate another colleague S's birthday. When everybody sat down, I saw that M was very patiently checking S out and asking questions about her work and family etc. Most of the time, M would just listen and nod and let S talk. Often, she will resonate to what S said and continue to ask more questions.

通过这次吃饭，我大概了解了为什么M 可以坐上她今天的位置。大家各自的长处不同，所以成功的方式也各不相同。M 的优点在于她非常注重人际关系，在日常工作中一直在着重建立和维持个人关系。而且，她有非常好的倾听能力和同理心。这样让人更容易信任和亲近她。 在工作里，有些领导完全忽略了同理心和倾听的力量，让自己的团队无法更好地凝聚。

After this dinner, I understand a little bit more why M can take on VP's role. Every successful people are different and have their own path to success. What M is good at is her people skill. She pays very high attention to establishing personal relationship. She listens and resonates. Her people skill helps her to get to other people easier. People likes to be around her. There are many leaders whom underestimate the power of listening and can't hold the whole team together.

具有同理心并愿意倾听的人，大家都喜欢和她做朋友，而且都喜欢把自己的故事和困扰讲给她听。大家在生活里难免都有烦恼的时刻，有时候只是想找人倾述，或找个临时的肩膀靠一靠。能够提供这样帮助的人将得到更多的朋友并提高凝聚力，同样也能更好地通过倾听找到问题的所在，更好地保证她的成功。

We all like to be around people whom listens, we like to share our stories and problems with them. There are high and lows in life, sometimes, we just need people to listen. When someone offers their hands when we need a shoulder to lean on, I believe the bond and friendship will be stronger after that. With good listening, people will be able to find out root cause of an issue easier, which leads to a faster way to resolve the problem and make them more successful.

希望大家都能够做个更好的倾听者。

Hope we can all be a better listener.