24 Staircases That Really Step It Up

“L’esprit de l’escalier” is the French phrase for when you think of a good comeback just a little too late to actually use it. It literally translates to “the spirit of the stairs,” and Philosopher Denis Diderot came up with it after he was roasted so brutally at a party that he couldn’t even think of a response until he was on the stairs out.

Alas, I can’t offer a cure for l’esprit de l’escalier, but I can offer you some beautiful staircases to have it on.

These 24 staircases stun with their beautiful, creative, and functional designs, and looking at them may ease the sting of realizing the perfect comeback to your obnoxious cousin’s veiled insults seconds after you leave the family reunion.

1. It’s Hip To Be Square: The design here is more practical than many on the list; it’s designed to fit into one square meter of floor space, making it easy to drop in an attic staircase. Everything about this piece is designed for functionality, from the thin safety railing up the center to the gripping treads on the edge of each stair – except for the color, which is just sheer beauty for the purpose of beauty.
   
2. Cultural Mosaic: Sometimes, the simplest designs are the most beautiful. The 16th Avenue Tiled Steps in San Francisco are the brainchild of ceramist Aileen Barr and mosaic artist Colette Crutcher, and 300 community volunteers helped make their vision happen. Nowadays, the steps draw tourists and locals who need a little pick-me-up.
   
3. Somewhere Over The Rainbow: This staircase, featured in London’s appropriately-named Rainbow House, turns a white room into a riot of color with the application of carefully-selected paint. The house, which you can rent for a cool £15,000 a month, also features a slide down into the living room.
   
4. Say What?: According to parent company Atmos Design, these stairs are “a continuation and intensification of the simple graphics skirting board lines that trace their way through the house” that “expand like a genie released from a lamp, curling and separating and bifurcating from the wall to form the delicate edge of the stair treads.” I mean, I don’t understand a word of that, but they sure are pretty!
   
5. Man’s Best Friend: This double staircase (designer sadly unlocatable) allows you to take the stairs with your furry companion without straining them. I think this is objectively a good feature for a set of stairs. My opinion has nothing to do with how my very tiny, very useless dog cries for me at the top of the stairs the whole time I’m walking up them.
   
6. Intelligent Design: This mesmerizing staircase is based on the design of DNA, the helical molecules that provide the blueprints for our bodies. The spiral staircase is just as well-designed as the little molecule; the staircase is beautiful and streamlined, and it’s also relatively safe! (EeStairs)
   
7. Blue Ribbon: This Prague staircase was modeled after a “delicate rippling ribbon,” and is made of “10mm thick sheet metal,” neither of those phrases which inspire a great amount of confidence in its ability to bear weight. Just looking at this image, I’m already overcome by the feeling that I should be suing someone for damages.
   
8. Birdcage Stairs: For something that looks so ephemeral, these stairs (designed by Atelier Archiplein for a house in Rochebaudin, France) are surprisingly sturdy. They look like a safe place for kids to pretend that they’re trapped in jail and bang on the bars loudly demanding freedom. Ah, the joys of childhood play.
   
9. Whatever Floats Your Boat (Or Not): I’m a simple woman with simple beliefs: lemonade should always be more tart than sweet, cookies should be soft rather than crisp, peanut butter sandwiches should be served on untoasted bread, and floating stairs shouldn’t exist. These stairs were designed by Seoul design house Moon Hoon and, even though they go against my spiritual and architectural beliefs, I’m impressed by their minimalism.