The Tempest Papers: Letters from a Boat Cat to her Human on Land
Here it is, another installment of the lost letters from Tempest, the Boat Cat to her Human, Paris back on land. A salty sailor cat with a bit of a sailor's language! The poor cat has been left on a boat to take care of four humans and two dogs along with one other cat, who isn't much help.
Today Tempest is giving her side of the story when the Georgetown, Bahamas Regatta comes to town:
Dear Paris,
There was far too much excitement going on yesterday. I'm not going to lie, I thought that perhaps there would be something interesting to break up the monotony of my days, but alas, it was not to be.
Instead it was like a day of stupid human tricks. (Ie: not interesting to a cat's superior intellect such as mine.)
You'll remember that we live on a sailboat, of course. I would think it would be a hard thing to forget since our house literally rocks back and forth and is surrounded by... I don't know... THE OCEAN.
Anyway, the humans were all a twitter (not the social media platform, you idiot, they were going about with an air of excitement). Not just our humans, but I could hear the excitement spilling over from other boats, so I thought it must be something big.
You know what they were all excited about? They al climbed up on their decks, beers in hand (or whatever the hell that nasty stuff is that they drink) and watched excitedly...
As boats went by.
Boats.
BOATS.
Are you catching the irony right now? These people who LIVE ON BOATS were being highly entertained by watching other boats going by. They said it was a race, but that was a sad spectacle of a race if I ever saw one. My old three legged grandma can run faster than those boats were going and she has arthritis in all three legs.
I'm beginning to think that I'm surrounded by morons.
The smartest one of the bunch,
Tempest
Queen of the boat pets, Overlord of the floating Castle of 11 Purple Monkeys, Sadly unamused by Humans. #tempestpapers
All photos are mine, from our time spent on the boat with Tempest!
Check back tomorrow for some more Tempest Papers!
This weekend is my weekend keeping two toddlers all weekend. It's been a very long time since I was in charge of two toddlers 24/7! I have a couple more Tempest Paper posts for you and I will be around again more on Monday to socialize more, read the awesome "How We Met" CONTEST entries that are coming in
- You can also read MY 'How We Met' Story And Patrick's perspective of our 'How We Met'!)
Until then, enjoy your weekend and have a smile with Tempest, the boat cat and her letters home! Here's the link if you missed last week's Tempest Papers!
I like this post and all pictures. Really nice and very good also. You are a powerful steemian so wishing your upvote at al of my post. Following you.
Thank you for reading! I hope you find more posts to enjoy!
@byn
LoL, very cleverly written and super unique! i really like your style.. following
What a beautiful and observant kitty. 😸
Love the Tempest Papers! Keep it up.
Hope you survived the toddlers too :)
barely! I am feeling my age today after getting up with a baby several times a night for two nights. I'm glad I had my kids young!!! :)
Thank you for reading!
Can't be too bad...I'm 51 and have a 2 y/o at home ;)
Thanks for writing!
Dear God in Heaven. Color me impressed. I'd go batshit crazy.
Oh, I forgot to mention that I AM batshit crazy o_0
I knew I liked you for some reason! We have that in common! Lol
Well there is something to be said for having your OWN 2 year old at home. When it was my own toddlers, I could just roll over and breastfeed and didn't wake up at every single sound. With this weekend, I had to do bottles and woke up at the slightest noise and was totally on edge. The baby was just great, I was a wreck!!! :)
Well to be honest I'm not breastfeeding, so THAT helps. And I never woke up to every sound, cause I'm a dad and we just don't. Loud sounds yes - every sound, not a chance.
Of course this 2 year-old hasn't even had a bottle in - what - over a year now? And she's been sleeping through the night since 3 months old or so. Yep, we were that lucky family.
She is something of a handful during the day when trying to write though, and that's what's driven me batshit crazy. That and her siblings.
Lol, I guess we have different perspectives :)
It's definitely a lot more work than I remember. I'm glad I got my 'baby days' out of the way while we were still young (although I've had plenty of friends having kids in their 40's or raising their grandkids, so I'm not going to be too cocky about it for fear of it being a challenge to the universe or something!)
I'm just a glutton for punishment.
Oldest 22
Youngest 2
And please for the love of everything holy and unholy - DON'T CHALLENGE THE UNIVERSE! Something out there loves to laugh at us.
Oh my. I can NOT imagine!!! Our kids are 26, 22, 21, 19 & 17. We had them lose together, but I suppose there were a few years of just pure chaos in there that I'm sure I'm forgetting :)
I will definitely avoid the challenging of the universe! :) Good luck and LOTS of luck to you!
Cats make about 100 different sounds. Dogs make only about 10.
Cats purr at the same frequency as an idling diesel engine, about 26 cycles per second.
This seems interesting and hilarious.
I imagine if a cat would be able to write home this is exactly how it would sound like.