You're plain and that is great, we don't have any ketchup or mustard in our fridge and we regularly eat bologna on homemade bread. Our salad dressings are literally a dash of olive oil and a drench of whatever vinegar we have. Are you hungry yet? Rest assured that these little people ain't going to find anything about you.

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you and then you win.