Sci-fi Novel - The Dream Artist - Part 48

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16
Part 17
Part 18
Part 19
Part 20
Part 21
Part 22
Part 23
Part 24
Part 25
Part 26
Part 27
Part 28
Part 29
Part 30
Part 31
Part 32
Part 33
Part 34
Part 35
Part 36
Part 37
Part 38
Part 39
Part 40
Part 41
Part 42
Part 43
Part 44
Part 45
Part 46
Part 47

Part 48

“I was not a happy child, and I found myself in the midst of darkness as soon as I stepped into puberty,” Peri continued.

“I can't say that therapy sessions and depression medications have never been effective, but I felt the depression so deep that I could not continue my life in a normal way. My studies and relationships with friends have deteriorated rapidly. I didn't want to go to school, and I didn't have the slightest interest in what was happening around. I felt like I was burning in hell, and what I felt was far worse than what I had projected out. I tried to commit suicide as patients in these situations often do when the treatments were not a solution after months. One day I woke up early, terrorized by the terrible dreams I had at night, I found myself on the balcony, in the brightness of the morning sun. I climbed the railing in a calm mood. It was like the big gap between the balcony, and the floor was calling me. I was hoping that after I jumped, I would light up like an angel in my white nightgown. Just a few seconds before the disease cost my life, my mother suddenly jumped out of her sleep and came to the balcony. She grabbed me from my waist and took me down. The doctor at the hospital said, “so the maternal instinct has once again prevailed in death. After this stage, we can no longer leave our job to chance; it is time to turn to more radical solutions.”

I didn't even wonder what the radical solution would be, as a result of the emotional tension I experienced, I felt like I was plunged into an abyss of numbness. The next day, I was in operation on the bottom floor of Berlin's largest hospital. I've got some kind of regulator in my head. When I got out of the narcosis, there was no change in my mood. The world was dark, and I felt as fragile as a porcelain doll. My doctor told me that I would be a completely different person in a month with the German rationalist self-confidence. The regulator turned me into a different person beyond what I expected. I felt better from day to day. Both my parents and friends loved and adopted this new person.”

A quadcopter followed by a group of minicopters passed over the Golden Horn. The rain began to boil in large droplets and began to spread out in the tent above us.

“The doctor did a good job,” I said.

“He certainly did a good job from a business productivity perspective. He must be congratulated on the fact that he saved me from the spiritual torment. But when it comes to feeling, it is certain that there is a decrease in my soul. When I gained my new personality, due to the horrifying memory of the spiritual pain I experienced before the operation, I have missed it. As the memory of spiritual torment was rapidly fading over time, the memory of the strong enthusiasm that I rarely experienced as a child, and the instant enjoyment of the impressions was never erased from my mind. I wasn't in pain, but I missed my enthusiasm, my excitement was colorless. Long before Selim Özben's investigation, the seeds of these thoughts began to appear in my mind. Sometimes I think of things like that, and then I forget about them in everyday situations. I have been aware of the abundance of emotions, colors, and impressions by the effects of the thousands of dreams I have watched in recent days. When I was a kid, maybe I was upset and fragile, but I could feel life more deeply. I decided that I could take the regulator out of my life and manage my mind with less dominating treatments. And I did this on my trip to Germany two weeks ago. My doctor said that the regulator's effect would go away. Now I think I'm experiencing times when I'm not under the protective shield of the regulator in the face of the world.”

It started to rain as if it was pouring out of the glass. Peri handed her hand to the rainwater flowing from the tent. While she slammed the open palm towards the sky, the water broke, and in the form of large drops flowed down the cliff next. There was a lovely expression on the face of Peri, a mixture of sadness and pride, that I had never seen before; she admired the waters of the Golden Horn that were wrought by rain and the dark clouds that were rapidly changing position on the horizon. I was glad that she was happy with her decision.

“I'm glad you started to enjoy watching the world. There was an investigation we had. I think it's time to go and finish it.”

“Are you happy with yourself?" Peri asked.

”The technology that could cure me has not yet been invented, " I said, taking a sip of the cold tea.

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