How the fuck - to actually find a mentor? (Part 1)

re: "Find your Master YODA - Mentors are important"
https://steemit.com/business/@dragonho/find-your-master-yoda-mentors-are-important

There's a great initial post from @dragonho that inspired me to write a bit more regarding that topic after having some interesting discussions in the comments sections with quite some people, all looking for mentors.
So, after you read the post and are motivated, how do you actually approach that issue in real-life?
Sure, your intentions by simply asking on an internet-forum might be honest, but do you really expect posting an arbitraryly sounding comment like "Do you want to be my mentor!?!" like everyone else would achieve anything?
Mentors don't simply drop from the skies, waiting for the hordes of willfull students pouring into their temples to teach them wisdom and secret knowledge. That's for Hollywood... Or cheesy Gurus.  


The Yoda stuff



Being a mentor myself in several areas and niches of life, and having found a few great ones so far myself, there are some thoughts from quite some years of experience and both ends of the spectrum, that might help one person or the other.
First of all, finding a mentor is a 2-way relationship, like everything else with human beings. It's really as simple as it sound and no secret that a mentor profits from supporting you in some way in the long-run, like you profit from them.
Be it by i.e. becoming better at mentoring if they want to specalize and grow their skills there, by getting valuable input and new ideas, building friendships or business opportunities, to really wanting to help grow a strong community in their field of interest and surrounding.   People they can really rely on in a world that's often focused on greed and ego.
That being said, after some years, NO ONE is interested in doing the mentoring stuff just for the sake of it. So simply don't expect mentors waiting for you on the next doorstep.

Step 1 - Build an interesting life. Duh!



Go out and start meeting like-minded people. It really doesn't matter if you like collecting stamps, look for the local Bitcoin crowd or have a love for swinger-clubs. Do what you love and become better.
Build your social skills, be honest and genuine and add value to the group you are involved. Make yourself noticeable by being creative and helpful out of true motivation. Not with the goal to finding a mentor, but by showing you're really interested in building something and supporting the people and ideas there.
Why? Because that's why you're there for in the first place!

Nobody can guarantee you a wise men with a long white-beard initiating you into a secret sex-club with models waiting to be worshipped. So, for what it's worth, you at least found some friends and knowledge to grow and had fun. That might come in handy, later.
The thing is, a lot of people are looking for or think they "need" a mentor to get along in life.
While all that might actually be true, you make your success and advancement dependent on others and narrowing your field of possibilities.

You think you'll dress up and find a mentor for i.e. "trading stocks" by visiting a bar on Wallstreet where all those guys and girls hang out after work?
I can assure you from my time in finance... After 12hrs in front of 8 computer screens, blinking charts and ringing phones, all they want to do is hang out there to have fun, relax and shut their mind from all the crap of the day. The last thing they want to talk is serious business.
Sure, a few might close a deal once in a while or trying to network, others will chat about their day and some might even notice you and take the opportunity to brag, but whatever you have to offer, you're not playing in the league of those closed circles regarding what they are looking for in such moments:

Step 2 - Human connection

So, if not the obvious, where to look for mentors then? That's easier asked than answered. One might find a mentor at an art exhibition or a self-improvement tantra seminar or in a remote area on a fishing trip.  
Sometimes people might hang around with each other for years without any closer interactions, or have been in the same circle of friends forever but never met. And suddenly, all pieces fall into place. Who knows?
What's important is, it's mostly the personal level where it's going to click. Business comes later.  Doesn't sound helpful or ralistic?  Well...

EVERY single mentor or student I had, I found exactly that way. I bumped into several of them at bars with a beer in my hand in the evenings after intense seminars that go over days, sometimes weeks, by accident. That happened at least twice. Once during a 2-weeks seminar in the outskirts of Budapest, once 2 weeks in an old-villa of Munich...
I was hanging out with the "New Austrians" around Prof. Fekete who, in addition btw, I had the honor of having countless hours of priceless, deep conversations over two years including severeral mindfucks regarding economics.
http://nasoe.chayns.net/aboutus?id=93  
A bunch of the most interesting and lovely people in the field I ever met, including those who changed my life in ways I could never have imagined.
Oh and btw: On one of those seminars around 2011 or so, I also met @fabio who just introduced me to Steemit a months ago! Big THANKS for that! ;)

Did I go there to meet a mentor? No.
Was I there to have fun, widen my horizon and meet interesting people and share weird ideas about "fringe economics"? Hell YES!

Wanna hear another strange story?
I was following one of my "dirty hobbies" I indulge in occasionally, having a short-trip to Amsterdam for a few days on my own to chill and do basically nothing.
What followed some nice conversations with like-minded crowds, not caring about career choices, education or looks, in a cosy, tiny Coffeeshop rolling some joints? - A guy sitting down on the table next to me wearing sweat pants and, for only the gods know whatever reasons, we started to share our love for Nepalese import hash for 2 hours before it even came to our minds mentioning our jobs.
Turned out he was a senior hedge-fund manager who was there for a short vacation to forget about numbers and job stress, just like me. We became close friends until he decided to retire in Australia and to only care about family and sheep anymore. :)

You know, all those people you try to get in contact with for their ability to help you grow, they are people too with human needs and habits...


Part - 2: https://steemit.com/business/@oululahti/how-the-fuck-to-actually-find-a-mentor-part-2