The Broken Hearted writing contest - The One that Got Away

in #brokenheartedcontest7 years ago (edited)

This is my entry in #heartbrockenhearted contd hosted by @tpkidkai. I do really appreciate this contest as I need someone who felt sorry for me in my grief.

I've got the most precious gift in my entire 25 years of existence. Got pregnant last June 29, 2017. Everything fall into its place, from the very first day I knew that there was a life inside me I felt blessed and well love. The love that I've been seeking for a long time . I become the better version of myself, I strive hard to prepare for his coming. Every day I woke up with a smile and a positive vision that despite of everything I have my mini me growing inside me.

Despite of all the pain and discomfort I felt still, I'm happy and enjoying every step of the way. :)
As a first time mom, I want every thing are well prepared. I spoke to my child every hour. That feeling that you knew he is answering you even if no words to hear. I make it sure that I dont missed any of my pranatal appt. Every thing is well fine until on the last month of my 2nd trimester last OCTOBER 19, 2017, I didn't sleep the whole night. I dont know whats bothering me but I felt so well at the time. Early morning I do all my daily routine, I took my wook at 7 am since I'm engage into homebased appointment setting job.
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I decided to take early out from work since I felt sleepy. Still I dont have any negative thought at that time I spoke to my child, if his okay, I even sang him a song to make him feel better inside me. While lying in bed I felt a water flow in my legs. From that day my life fell apart. My dream shattered into pieces.
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My OB tent to keep the baby for rour days hoping that he will survive. Every minute they check the heart beat of my baby and it was an amazing feeling of hope that he still fighting and hold on as his heart beat is normal. I celebrate my 26th birthday and all I wished is to have a miracle for my baby.
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Still, my OB decided to take my baby off as sooner he will died inside me due to lack of ameotic fluid. I don't understand my this need to happend. Everybody symphatized on me, they say that every thing happens for a reason but for me theres no valid reason to take my son away.
It's been 3 months since I lost my baby but I left in the middle of know where...

I lost my child. I lost my only hope. I lost my life....

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Sorry for your loss.

**I am sorry but the picture at the end is disturbing. Maybe a little head's up?

@leeart sorry for that I'll gonna remove the pic. now

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