i miss you

i wanted to talk about it, you and i we were abrupted so suddenly, we were making love one minute, not talking to one another the next... i never got to talk to you again.. i wasn't ready to because i was hurting so much, all that mattered is that we are not together anymore... the reason didn't matter ... you were cold towards me, one minute you were calling me my love and the next you just wrote hi.... you told me you don't want to be with anyone at all for the moment and there you were, sharing stories on IG with someone who was publically writing i love you to you and you were re-posting that. I never hated you, I was just hurting. Hurting that you broke up with me... then hurting because you passed an STD to me and never apologized for it, and it doesn't matter that you didn't know about it, fact remains fact - your irresponsibility harmed me ... and then i was hurting because it took you a second to move on...

i miss you, but everyone from my inner circle suggests that it is a bad idea to talk to you because i will do nothing other than reopen unhealed wounds... apparently not talking to you is what might make you miss me.... apparently it shows my own lack of self respect if i write to you.... apparently you will have the upper hand if i do...but my inner circle never lay in bed with you while watching a movie and hugging, they never felt the warmth of your hugs, your kisses, they never looked into the deep of your eyes...

i want us to talk... but i don't want you to act hostile... i am struggling through all this.