Geesh this could not be more true! I so often experience the exact same thing if that makes sense. I'd definitely classify myself as a hobbyist as well. There is no way I would dare call myself a professional as I am still in the early stages of learning and would much rather prefer to stay where I am with bonsai in general. I do like the bonsai you started with though - a good few years from now it will definitely look super cool and you know what, it is unique - you get to say that you put your effort into that tree. Nobody can take that away from you!