THE PAIN OF DOING A POSSETIVE DEED

It's one of them odd things. You do something, for a kind reason. Then the inevitable doubt settles in.
Have I been stupid?
Should I have taken, rather than given?
Why did I do it?

Now with dwindling resources I look at my possitive deed, giving rather than taking with very different eyes.
I find :

Am I going to be able to survive?
Was it all worth it?
Will I be taken advantage of?

The ego steps in place. But also pain and fear.
Where should I go from here?
An will this help me in the future?

All the people I could help.
But will I be helped?
Am I going to loose it all, because I helped others?

"It's hard to help others when there is so much at stake in your personal life."