The wonder of a scream

So, how does it feel to be a blunder of existence, I wonder? As I stood with my heel on her throat I asked myself what wonderful thought was travelling through her brain. Was it my grandeur? Obviously not. It's hard to praise your abuser sometimes when he takes you by the hand into the labyrinth of pain and into the secret chamber in the center, where miles and miles can be found of needles and whips just waiting to destroy the naïve's naïveté.

I pressed my heel and watched her consciousness scream for liberation, for an increase, for the generosity of the ungenerous. I remember that I smiled at that point as a sublime feeling of power crawled through my blood, making me feel royal. I pressed even more. Not doing so would be against my will to explore the rough paths of pain and despair. Then I let go as I felt that reluctance was finding the slippery slope toward her brain.

It is no fun to torture the uncaring. It's necessary to let a bit of hope slither into her brain, just enough until her eyes brighten and a bit of comfort warms her eyes and she cries as if she had found her father in the lost forest. Then I like to snatch it all in one second. That is the strongest scream and the most pleasurable. I've witnessed it so many times, yet I can't tire of it.

A crystal scream

I could compare this disheartening scream to the most beautiful and most transparent crystal I've seen being shattered into one trillion pieces, falling on the ground as a white sand, leaving of itself only the echo of the shattering in an acoustic room especially designed for this occasion, to eternalize the image of the beauty of destruction.

I could compare this disheartening scream to a magnificent sight in the loveliest of places. To feel it tear itself away from her vocal cords, the purest of agonies, the essence of despair. And then the sobs, with my heal on top of her head as she knows that she has fallen. I know that if I had taken my heel off of her, she would have stayed there crying. But I pressed down until another scream of pain came through.

Why leave the party early?
There's so much to break in an unscarred body with an unscarred mind.

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