Daily Pizza Delivery Story - “Tits for a tip”

Daily Pizza Delivery Story is “Tits for a tip” - Todays pizza delivery story is about receiving a tip in the form of tits. So basically short story involving some big boobs. It was a busy Friday night in Providence and all the clubs were packed, I think it was “lil rapper” night, I remember seeing one of the club marquees reading like “lil Thotty Fots” or “Lil P. Stains” there was a few clubs with musicians playing this particular night.
I noticed that there was a large amount of girls waiting in line outside the clubs. So just like every Friday night you deliver to a bunch of drunk college kids, some sober chinese kids, and then you get some of the people that are watching Game of Thrones that of been inside the house the last three days, it’s a mixed crowd on a Friday night but this night something was different. So as a single male pizza delivery driver I haven’t had to many crazy girl stories, I mean every driver that’s a male hopes that he can get the chance to cut a hole in the pizza, put his dick through and deliver the big sausage pizza and get a hot drunk chick to blow ya, but realistically there never has been in a situation where I could tell if the girl was getting turned on by me delivering garlic sticks, and a white sauce, red pepper and onion pizza and no girl has ever given me their number and said come back after you’re done working. Thats how it works in porn and porn mimics real life situations so whats up, wheres my “fuck the delivery driver” moment?
So needless to say I could feel it in the air, and no, that wasn’t the song playing that’s a genuine feeling I had that somethings going to happen this night, I just didn’t know what, when and how. So now 2:30 a.m. rolls around and we get the after the club rush, calls are coming in and people are drunk and hungry and our place is the only place thats open for delivery!!
I take 3 different deliveries to 3 different addresses all of the delivery slips had girls names, not womans names like “Judith”, “Margret”, or “Phyllis” they were more like “Jenny”, “Nikki”, and “Lizzy” which Lizzy could be a lesbian, I mean the odds are greater nowadays especially when a female has a funky letter in their name like a Z or Q. In that scenario I always expect 1 out of 3 is probably a lesbian. So I remember one of my co-workers saying one of the delivery’s I have called to order and sounded wasted, but thats a usual Friday night thing because of the college kids learning the ways of alcohol.

So anyways now I get to the first stop and call up customer #1 “Nikki” she answers and says shes on her way down, I get the front door and some shaggy looking dude answers the door and signs the receipt which is cool but the fact that he didn’t tip me tells me he’s probably a douche of a boyfriend. Stop #2 is “Lizzy” and just as anticipated Lizzy is 100% a carpet muncher, she has the spiked out orange hair with face piercings that match, black jeans with rips and tears, and a bowling shirt, no make up and all around the outside of her mouth was shimmering like she missed putting on chap stick, so Lizzy tips me $5 bucks and I keep it moving. Now I get to stop #3 “Jenny”, I call Jenny and she sounds wasted, I never heard someone slur the word “hello” so badly. She comes down and has a receipt to sign and normally I dont even give the super drunk ones a pen let alone expect them to sign a legible signature with a tip and total, but I said fuck it, lets watch this chick try and figure out how a pen and paper work and see if shes capable of doing some math. Surprisingly she actually did a decent job signing then she says “hey do you take boobs for a tip?”, and I said “uhhhh, what was that” and she replied “can I tip with my tits?” and I thought to 34 year old self “is it ok to say yes”, “Am I contributing to a rape by allowing this young drunk college chick to flash me in exchange for a tip?” and the thought “is this technically prostitution?” All these thoughts came after I said yeah of course and then “fa lumph” “fa lumph” 2 big ol titties fell out of her brah!!! She drunkenly lifted her shirt up like how drunk girls do, you know, it looks like a three year old learning how to take a sweater off for the first time, real goofy looking, you know? So these balloons are hanging and im obviously stunned and shes like “what do you think?” and I’m all like “yuuum yuuum yuuum” and then she laughs and laughs and runs upstairs with her extra cheese, mushroom, and pepperoni pizza and leaves me with this image in my head of 2 perfectly balanced college boobs in my head.
The scary part of the situation was after I left my phone starts ringing, it was Jenny I thought she was calling to say “hey sexi pizza guy, come over after you get out and bring me your large.....sausage...pizza” but of course my luck wouldn’t be that good and she just drunk dialed me and got my hopes up, I was left holding my phone saying hello, hello, hello, and later that night, I was left holding something else by myself. So thats my pizza delivery story of the day “Tit for Tips” and the lesson learned is, next time keep the camera accessible and get pictures for later when I’m home in bed.