“To be a champion, compete; to be a great champion, compete with the best; but to be the greatest champion, compete with yourself.” ― Matshona Dhliwayo

I think it is safe to say that a good portion of us spend a large part of our lives not only comparing ourselves to others, but competing with others too - and it is only as you get a little older and perhaps a teensy bit more mature (aka – OLD! lol) that you come to the realisation that it really is SO senseless!

Have you ever listened to two or more kids competing over facts about something? It the most amusing thing to listen to!

“I have 10 cars” - “Well, I have 20 cars” - “weeellll I, have 100 cars”

As adults we will listen to conversations like this unfold and giggle to ourselves at how ridiculous they sound… but what makes us think we sound any different in our “adult versions” of these incidents… hehe, because truth be told – there is NO difference other than possibly the content – true story! Haha!

Now, before anybody jumps onto any bandwagon – I am NOT saying that there is anything wrong with being healthily competitive – that in itself is a part of how we motivate and drive ourselves as individuals – which is a very good thing – but what I am saying is that some people just take it to an entirely different level… one which leaves the healthy arena and enters the obsessive one – and this is no longer a good thing because it begins to affect you personally on a psychological and emotional level.

In a matter of speaking – becoming obsessively competitive or comparative will start to leave you feeling empty.

By being obsessively competitive...

you are constantly looking at somebody else’s achievements and reminding yourself about the lack of yours – or the fact that yours possibly aren’t as “grand”. This takes a positive situation and flips it on its head into a potentially VERY bad one, because you are breeding negative thought and this is a habit that is going to disintegrate your self-worth literally one thought at a time. It also changes healthy competition into something that often becomes nasty - which can ultimately destroy friendships, relationships and many other kinds of interactions – as well as YOU as a person!

In being obsessively comparative...

you are also encouraging negative self-talk and I don’t think I really need to elaborate on why this is not in any way a good thing. There is absolutely NOTHING good that can come from being envious or jealous about what somebody else has or is. It is not far thrown from the saying “don’t read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.” – Another true story!

And not to mention that both of these behaviours are catalysts for extorted levels of stress and anxiety!

There is a fine line, but a vast difference between being a healthily competitive achiever or a constructive admirer versus being obsessive on either count.

“Living one's life as if it is a competition between oneself and others, is an inevitable path to a stressful life.” ― Edmond Mbiaka

If you want to become obsessively competitive or comparative… then do that with yourself, by yourself!

Until next time...

Much Love from Cape Town, South Africa xxx

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