My son, my future daughter and what frightens me.
Sometimes i get so scared, i feel like the stigma of being a young parent in Canada weighs heavy on me and my family. A one year old, a baby due within a week and what do i have? A ‘99 sunfire, a cellphone about 700$ in cryptoinvestments an 80$ steem account and have had no results from my job hunting which scares me in regards to rent next month.
Im worried, because although we literally starve ourselves to make sure River has literally every single thing a baby needs and all the stuff to prep for baby too. We have to worry about the fact that im on antidepressants and medical marijuana.
Ive had people threaten to call cps on me because i smell like weed and am holding my son. So ive basically quit using my medicine and have been avoiding that particular addition to the previously mentioned stigma.
I would literally die for my family. Like no joke wouldnt think twice.
But im drowning, the debt, the struggle, the physical pain. How am i supposed to crawl my way out when all anybody ever does is ask for things? I give and give and somehow people keep taking and my hole grows.
Im jaded, i know, but im optimistic, i see bright beautiful futures ahead and im ecstatic. But reality keeps hitting me in the face. Broke down car here, medical charge there.
I dont know, i vent, im to stubborn to really ask for any help. But i havent eaten a real meal in days, mashed potatoes, ichiban, coffee and cigarettes. But we have diapers. We have baby food galore. Milk and eggs. I want to be successful i want to show the world what im capable of i want to be a father worth respecting an a dad worth loving.
When i look into my sons big beautiful blue eyes i see so much hope, i see wonder and love. I see somebody who sees the real me and it drives me. I hope that drive can translate here.
I want to educate people on what they really need to know about crypto, like the fact i hold ada and srn not for market value or anything oter than the fact when the finney phone comes out i plan on doing an unboxing video and a tutorial and using the hell out of this phone.
Like the world of crypto is so vast, and anybody who doesnt have time to surf trough the words can ask me to elp them decipher if the investment will be successful but more importantly useful in the real world.
I am DizzyJay, follow me @dizzyjay
I will reply to real questions, i will support real goals. Im here for community, bew friends and new directions. As my family evolves so too will my blogging. As i grow more wise so too shall my words to you.
I will not skimp. I will not post useless unimportant issues.
I will post love and transparency, knowledge is power. In math we trust.
Much love!
I hope to see some new comments and fresh faces on my blog!
If you need anything or have a job that i could do for your business, i will research and write for you. Just be honest and open about what you need and i will reciprocate.
I want to throw a few more pictures of my son and myself on here. This is me. I know its not alot but im dead serious about my intentions here, steemit is my social media home.
Lets chase our dreams together!
#steemian4life
I have been told that in BC, Canada, marijuana use is NOT allowed to be used as a reason for MCFD to take away children. And in your case it would be especially true since it is Medical Marijuana.
You can do your own research to back up what I say, because I would never want to risk your family with bad information, but someone that I know was told this by her own Social Worker and lawyer. The Social Workers ripped into her for other supposed issues that they conjured up -- but they never tried to use occasional marijuana use against her. I would think that they would have if they could have.
I actually have read similar things, but its more the stigma, the fact people are willing to look at me with disgust because of a plant i smoke. I dont do it in front of my kid, i dont leave it out. I just like strong and smelly varieties. So i often carry the aroma with me. What really bothers me about it honestly is that my kids are legitimately the absolute most important part of my life. I wouldnt hesitate to give my life for them.
For people to so ignorantly throw around threats like that it just breaks my heart. Its not a joke. My entire life could be turned upside down because of a threat like that. Its like if a whale on steemit were to downvote me because i like ethereum more than bitcoin. Because i dont agree with their views on life. Its damn terrifying to know one ignorant person decides to call them and suddely it make my hard work as a parent look insignificant because someone else who doesnt know me thinks they know whats best for a child they dont know and love. They dont cry in joy having him fall asleep in their arms. They dont rush home to see his smile. Yes i medicate with marijuana, but when im home with him i dont need any medicine. I use it for the times im not with my family. Depression, anxiety, fear thats what the pot is for. My love is strictly for my kin. Thanks for everything @canadian-coconut i appreciate the words of solidarity. Its something i dont get much irl.
Nice post!
I will keep watching your posts from now on.
I`m a new witness looking for voters, so I want to invite you to give me a vote for witness.
As a reward, I will make 10 random picks from my voters adn I willl giveaway 30 SBD to each.
Like this I can help you with more that one upvote, and you can help me ti obtain more blocks!
Thank you!
This post was upvoted and resteemed by #thethreehugs. Thank you for your support of @familyprotection. #thethreehugs is currently donating 40% of "ALL" post payouts to @familyprotection.
Just started following you, I'm in BC too. Though I'm well established in a Community Health Care Career I share the same concerns as you do but there will always be a glimmer of hope. I worked with many patients outside the hospital protocols and have witnessed first hand the benefits of Medical marijuana use. Always the same lip service by the politicians followed by their actual policy of stomping down any progress. I have been following another Steemian and YouTuber @drutter and he's been my front line eyes unveiling the real truth of the state of activism for Marijuana use in BC and Canada. I have 3 dependents to take care of myself. No car but I have a home in this crazy housing market. God bless you.
Thank you for such kind words, i really appreciate that alot, I plan on doing this bloggingg thing more and more over the coming years and I do plan to promote free thinking and the ideas that i carry, im glad that they made you reflect and i hope that the effect of my words is beneficial to your life and not harmful. Much love
Mate - you are doing an awesome job... keep it up and something will come through for you! Having a solid family connection to ground and motivate you is one of the most important things in life - and it looks like you well and truly have that bit right!
Growing something from nothing is tough - but something tells me you’ve got what it takes.
Oh - and who gives a shit who judges you - don’t let it get you down!
Thanks bec, i keep my head up always. Sometimes sharing my insecurities helps me move past them. Its steemit that makes me feel comfortable talking about it, because my posts can find the people that need to read them. Maybe my venting will help others stiffen up their upper lip in solidarity to themselves
Forget about people who always have therehand out @dizzyjay do what u have to do for u and yours ! Keep ya head up and always stay positive. Sacrifice is key to success sometimes you got to starve to eat like a king in the end.
Like i get that, but people usually have a reason to have there hand out and until the world solves inequality we cant resolve it. So i understand i cant give now, but i can work towards a future in which i can give back in ways that better the people who care and need to be cared for. Its a great big world so we have a lot of work to do. The millenials like myself have alot of mess to clean up yet.
Respect mate! I'm in UK but similar story was a dad at 25 now I'm 30 with 2 boys! I work hard but get nowhere financially, had a fucked up life and trying to drag myself to high ground from that boggy mire. My depression is a battle but trying to deal with it naturally I've tried anti depressants but they were too strange. Steemit is an amazing place for making connections and it's very motivating so your in the right place! Keep going mate you've got the right attitude 👍
Have faith @dizzyjay everything will be ok! :)
Thank you, the dreamer in me is alive and well, my depression is under control. I just felt i needed to talk about it somewhere. Much love thanks so much for the kindness
I use this expression alot actually. It is a helpful mantra.
Nice blog. Upvoted! :)
Thank-you i hope you have a wondetful day!
Aww your little boy is adorable! Your devotion to your family is very apparent, @dizzyjay. Keep working hard at making the life you want for your babies. :)
Thank-youI wanted to be a dad since before i can remember. Its one of my 4 ultimate passions. 1. Parenting 2. Closed-ecosystem communities 3. Blockchain technology 4. Medical Marijuana advocacy and awareness. Much love!