Bullying Shaming, etc
Bullying Shaming, etc
Recently, I attended a research conference. I saw many posters showing casing ongoing research and I attended a few presentation sessions.
While the posters and sessions pointed out the possible effects of bullying, shaming, microaggressions, etc. not one was on resiliency and how to deal with any of the offending issues.
I am of the belief that all of the issues mentioned are in your head and a bit of resiliency or stoicism would render most of the offending issues ineffective.
There is an old say, "People and things are external. Feelings are internal and we must never allow the external to mess up the internal where we have control."
What are your thoughts?
Good discussion topic @rajbeekie :)
That seems be the norm with a lot of things. We're told there is an issue. They describe the issue, but no solution is offered up.
As for the saying...People really aren't external. As much as I have tried to use that thinking over the years and 'Sticks and stones may break my bones, words will never hurt me." Words are the most damaging of all. If you hear something over enough you start to believe it. No matter how hard you try, your brain still hears it and it becomes conditioned. When things like this happen, it's teaching ourselves and our kids how to handle it so it doesn't damage. Give them positive reinforcement or mantras to counteract the damaging effects.
If I had known this back then it would be much easier to deal with. It will help them in the future with a bully boss or coworker. They can just go on with their day shrugging them off.
Hello tryskele, thanks for your thoughtful reply. I am trying the people are an external thing and it does seem to work. I do hear what they are saying, but most time I am able to not personalize it. This is an area I will keep working on. I need to study more stoic philosophy. Do ahve a spplendid day.
When you find something let me know. The only way I have been dealing with things like this is to remind myself it's them and not me. That I will not let someone else control what I think of myself. And use positive reinforcement. Doesn't always work but I do seem to get over it quicker.
Check out some Youtube videos on Stoic philosophy. I found them to be helpful.
I like this one about personal choice. This is a good start.
Very cool. I'll check it out when when I get home in the morning.
Very helpful, it's closely related to mindfulness practiced by buddhists. With some key differences. It makes complete sense to me. I can see the practicality of it also. Thanks for sharing this. I truly appreciate it.