Recently, there's been a lot going on the whole body shaming front. Whenever you turn you will find one article or the other on this issue and yet so many of us unknowingly bodyshame those around us. Maybe the reason is that people are still clueless about this whole issue. I want to share my personal story with you guys.

Recently, I uploaded a picture of myself on Facebook. I went to the zoo and I saw beautiful flamingos and decided to get a picture taken. In the picture you only see a part of my face as I wanted it to be about the majestic birds enjoying. They were far and lack of camera didn't do much justice but I still wanted people to see the beauty of them.

A lot of people liked the picture and then there was one comment from a friend who said and I'm translating "wow you've grown so fat".

At first I felt hurt and uncomfortable and then I felt pity for that guy. Like, there I am sharing something about nature and all his eyes could see was the partial side of my cheek which looked a bit full. Instead of anything else, that's what his eyes wanted see and comment about? What a shame.

He probably thought he can say such a thing because he is my friend and he found it funny.

Don't be mistaken, that is one of the many ways you body shame people. In every friend group there is generally one or the other person who is a little bit fuller than the others. The 'friends' could give them the name 'fatty' or 'chubbs' or God knows what. They maybe say it in a friendly way, but have you ever stopped to think what would your friend be feeling at that moment?

It's things like that, that those people start to think that fat or being chubby or curvy is equal to ugly.

That is not true. World couldn't emphasize enough that women and men in all shapes and sizes are beautiful, we are all educated people! Then how are we still blinded by such notions? Now, the other part of body shaming is when people think, "oh, body shaming means picking on curvy women or people", but no that's not true. There are also many instances where these curvy women start to pick on the thin ones. Maybe it's their latent insecurity, envy or whatever. But to justify their own figure, they build this idea that only curves are beautiful and skinny women are not very women like.

I am saying it again - women and men in all shapes and sizes are beautiful.

And this is not just us, famous celebrities like Meghan Trainor and Nicki Minaj have unintentionally body shamed people. In Trainor's song 'All about the bass' you see her encouraging curvy women that every inch of them is perfect and she calls the skinny women as 'skinny bitches' and one of her line says "You know I won't be no stick-figure, silicone Barbie doll".

I mean what kind of a logic is this? To be able to feel good about yourself, why on earth do you need to bring someone else down? How on earth can you take a stand for certain people about a certain issue by doing the exact same thing to a group of other people. Whether skinny or whether you are curvy, both are equally great as long as you feel good about yourself. Whether you call someone fat or stick, you are a BODY SHAMING ASSHOLE.

I guess, it began so much with bringing down the curvy women that it has now become a war 'fat' and 'thin'. They constantly bring down each other to make themselves feel better or justify their body type. Take for instance this status from Nicki Minaj.

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^Link

Now I don't know why she feels this way, probably something of the sort did happen to her, perhaps she did face discrimination. Rumors say it is about Taylor Swift, who replied to this tweet. Still she didn't have the right to bring down others. It's the fault of these people, this group which sets standards.

We all suffer from this. So maybe let's just all stand together to fight this.

This is just the western world. If you consider countries like my own I.e. India, body shaming takes a whole new level of turn.

It's called being fairer in color or darker.

In India, if your complexion is a little bit darker then you are not considered as beautiful.

There are countless advertisements in India about fairness creams. And famous people are a part of launching and promoting such things. I mean come on! What kind of discrimination is that? People in India, and perhaps some other countries as well, go through these rigorous bleaching treatments. And these are the people who can afford it! Darker women in villages and small towns are discarded as ugly and not just by outsiders but from their own families. And I am saying this because I have seen this happen in my own family.

I remember once, my cousin walked up to me and said "you are so lucky that you are 'fair', any guy would marry you, everybody thinks you are beautiful. No guy would even look at me". Her statement hurt and disturbed me on so many levels that I cannot explain. Her needing an approval from a guy is whole other problem, but main issue is that she was 13 years old back then - and that's how she felt about her body and her face. Where did she get such a heinous thoughts? I asked her that, to which she replied "mom said so". I didn't sleep properly that night. Tossing and turning all night and thinking if your own mother will make you feel that way, what kind of hope do you have from society?

Honestly, I have been fortunate on this front. Throughout my childhood a lot of my friends used to call me 'moti' as in fatty, I would laugh in front of them but I would come home and cry in front of my mother. She would lift up my face and tell me "don't hang your face like that, you are a beautiful and remarkable young woman, so don't for a moment let anyone think that you are ugly". I never forgot what she said.

^{Luckily, both my mother and @sjennon accept what I look like. I quote @sjennon: "What are you talking about, you're effin' hot".}

My friend told me that, when she was young she was bullied by some people in her class and they would all her names like 'chick with anorexia' or 'a crack whore' due to her being thin.

Daily, people get comments like "oh you're so fat", "oh you look anorexic", "you're so dark", "you're too pale", "you're hair is too straight", "you're hair is too frizzy". And most of these are comments made actually by women and to women.

^{I love who I am}

I took my stand today against it, maybe we all should. Not everybody is lucky enough to have encouraging people around them! So maybe let's slowly start to work on this. Something to think about right?

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Share this as much as you can, so that every woman on atleast Steemit feels beautiful and heard!

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^{Written by @things, 2017. Edited by @sjennon. All rights reserved.}