I am lost and I need to find myself

Everyone has moments in their lives where they feel that something is not right and that they need time to figure out what that is. We call these mid-life crises or coming of age stories. Whatever the name, the message and meaning are always the same; when we hurt, we need to figure out how to solve it ourselves.

This weekend my best friend of 13 years my Boston terrier Odin, who had been showing signs of old age and had been having seizures, was euthanized and passed away in my arms. I am still hurting from this, and I am still not ready to fully face reality. Though I know that to fully succeed and continue my life as Odin would have wanted, I need to go on a journey to find myself and reconcile my loss.

That is why I have decided I need to go on one last walk with my puppy. I have already started packing for this 3-4 week long adventure. Over the course of these weeks I will be spreading a little bit of Odin around in flower fields, giant trees and of course many many rosemary bushes. I've been so engrossed with online activities recently, that I think to heal I need to reconnect my energy to nature, just as I had when I was younger. I feel that if I do not do this, I will not be able to maintain my creative energies and as such, my life will ground to a halt.

To do this though, required a huge leap in bravery, as I was worried that people would forget and abandon me should I leave on my journey. Though it was silly of me to think that, when I talked to my amazing friends, mentors and icons. They all told me the same thing; how can we help and you should do it.

Thank you Nolan @theprophet0, Linda @canadian-coconut, Aus @ausbitbank and Syko @sykochica, the wonderful denizens of @officialfuzzy's #whaleshares discord, and all the others who wished me well when I broke the news, thank you for showing me love and compassion that has never been shown to me by others before!

I love you all, thank you!