Hey hun yeah it can be really tough, people don't realise just how strong some of these kids can be - Katana is tiny but insanely strong able to flip large furniture just for the fun and challenge.

I was also given beltings for not obeying and quickly learned not to step out of line, but I was also living with my grandparents that just expected a different level of obedience.

I have found with true meltdowns discipline doesn't achieve anything but to aggravate the situation, I often have to leave the room if Kai gets to violent towards me - just let him try to calm down alone.

But if he is thrashing all over the place it is no longer safe to leave him unattended so I will sit next to him, he will pretty much always lay on his back and bicycle kick at me - I then just hold one leg each and let him kick away but control the legs so he doesn't hurt himself or me.

This is exhausting and can last for hours at a time, but usually by the end of it, he has no idea what started it all and is just so exhausted by his exertion he falls asleep - the real trick is to try and ensure he's over the meltdown before he sleeps, because if he isn't he can wake up and it can start all over again.

I have such respect for you raising a child with autism for that long my eldest is 7 youngest is 5 both going up a year this year, I do worry that when they get bigger it will only get harder to control the outbursts and anger.

They are already so strong, I have no way of imagining how much more power they will have when they are fully grown.

Your son is at the stage in his life I am most apprehensive about in my own children's future, I wish you nothing but strength and love through the hard times.

I agree we shouldn't live in fear, all I can say is we all need to learn about the beast and just keep trying - because in the end that's what Autism parents do for their amazing kids :D