having difficulty overcoming my ego's repressive 'fear' barriers, of which paralyze my movements. While I do not get physical or mental anxiety that dives into actual anguish, it besets frustration upon me when i hit these "walls". However, i've done some good and have been doing some descriptive writings which i will share with you when i finish :) I love messing around with language and creating automatic-surreal-prose. it's the best format to vomit out this pent-up creativity. I also started a fractal collage in photoshop and will post that soon, i really need to do more of those as they're pretty painless to create and the results are always interesting.
These paralyzing ego-barriers i'm mentioning find themselves before me whenever i try to work on my video series. while in hindsight these barriers appear irrational, they are too irrational when felt directly; However, they are nonetheless dizzying and frustrating to deal with, wasting precious time and energy. I know i'll get past them eventually, i've already seen the door towards the future i know is best.
I've come across some immense, epiphanetic, ( a grouping of epiphanies), visuals that have completely solidified after being languidly liquid for what seems like years. I've seen clearly what I can do and succinctly 'must' do. I can direct my destiny towards any destination and I've pinpointed the most serene and supernal horizon. For those who know, such zen clarity lasts only moments and only needs that much time. I believe in the me that believes in myself.
Thanks for reading through this, I'll eventually have a video where i describe this crystalline epiphany that has solidified itself within me. This will further clarify what i'm attempting to do here and elsewhere on the 'net.