THOUGHTS ON ABSTRACT ART. painting process 2018.

When I start a painting I let the paint I through on the canvas make random shapes and patterns. I get fascinated by the way paint organises itself through the laws of physics. Gravity, blending and repulsing, the elements find their own space in the painting. This is what fascinates me in nature and as an artist it seems I only try to make bad imitations.
Yes but no.
That is only real in part.
I could also say, this is my source of inspiration.

I have been thinking about what abstract art means to me and why do I feel deeply attracted to some and highly indifferent by others, What is it that I get from these few?
I found out that I do lean towards bringing my painting towards abstraction, but I can´t just do it from my mental centrum. I need to understand what it is I´m doing, feel I´m learning from it.
Why I´m pulled towards working further into abstraction is because I feel it will reflect better where I currently stand.
I don´t want to keep seeing people, plants, trees and obvious objects in my art anymore. I´m tired of them. I´ve seen them so much, it´s a habit I´m bored with.
My mind understands that recognisable imagery is a human dimension. If I search to explore others I need to leave the space unresolved, specially for myself. This is what I find hard.
I always have a tendency to resolve a pending situation, I like to take part in discovering. So I need to find a way to work with this, not ignore it.
For many years, resolving a painting meant to get an understanding from it related to whatever it was I was living though at that moment in my life.
In a way I still feel this is real to me and I get satisfaction from it.
Back then, I used to resolve it by illustrating, literally, what I got as the understanding. Sometimes the elements where there before the story and then the relationship between them would tell me the plot.

For the past few years I have been feeling different.
I no longer get the satisfaction from the detailed story as much as from the mystery. I like leaving the space more open to interpretation, (for me and for others). Like nature, everything is, and it´s the relationship between the elements that creates different elements. This is creativity.
Leaving it more open the ground is more fertile.

So back to the feeling of painting in the studio these days, when, as I´m starting new ones , having a wonderful time playing with drips and shapes and colours as I mentioned earlier, I become fascinated by these works and I feel divided between the voice that says that it is a finished piece in itself,( and contains the power of beauty created by chance) and the one who says it´s just the start of a new piece. It´s a map given to me by chance to see if I can find the figures it contains.
Usually I go with the second voice, because it´s closer to the way I feel.
Even so, a part of me keeps talking to me and asking me “why cant I just leave it to chance?” “isn´t this pure art?” “My be I´m destroying the piece by imposing my personal crap on it”

Not long ago I visited a friends exhibition where he had also been exploring the world of spontaneity, pure gesture and abstractness. These are very vibrant pieces, splashes with almost no concise intention. The artist had a great experience of liberation and playfulness from what I gather.
I had just been to see his former body of work(more figurative) in another gallery and then I came to this one to see this. I shared my honest point of view that is in reality a reflection of what I´m trying to understand.
I felt these pieces didn´t speak to me and I didn´t get it.
I got the fact he had had fun in the process but I didn´t see the point of sharing this body of work in a gallery. I said it was as if anyone could have done it. It had very little of his uniqueness in them.
The idea that came to me through his work spoke to my own.
I wasn´t convinced that my impression is correct or right, I just verbalised what I felt. I listened to this and wonder why I can´t just feel it´s enough to value a `left to chance piece´ as good art.
I feel it needs some work done on it.

This is the point I reached yesterday while I was painting that I found interesting.

I was really enjoying the process of just outlining, filling in and enhancing some lines or spaces that were in this beautifully organised set of drips and splashes. I thought the piece was so amazing as it was, but this other side of me wanted to interact with this beauty.
I felt a constant feeling of how much I might just be “destroying” the beauty that was there, I had to keep this delicate conversation with the piece promising I would respect it as much as possible.
As if I was dancing with a partner or jamming with a musician. I need to step lightly to keep the gracefulness it carries. I´m letting it teach me to follow the natural lines of energy it chose to show up.
I have to keep a high level of attention to not impose myself upon the image, listen to it´s nature and follow it´s steps. This is the sensation. It´s sure hard to maintain. At any given moment, if the attention drops, I have crushed the spirit it came with.

Here are some images that show the process I´m talking about in these thoughts.

I´m still working on this piece.
Will I kill it´s current magic or will I be able to keep it alive?
If I kill it I will have to bring it to life in an other form.
See what happens.

This was a part of my diaries where I think out loud to myself... thought I´d try to share.

Romanie

www.romanie.net