The Kapihan

Every first Monday of the month, my workplace observes an event called the Kapihan. It's basically a Filipino play on the word kape, which means coffee. During Kapihan, all staff get together in the conference or training room, report on significant stuff that took place the previous months, and introduce the new staff. (There's coffee or snacks involved, too!)

It was October's Kapihan, and I was the only new staff for the month of September.

Talent show

Apparently, all new staff had to undergo some sort of initiation: showcase your talent. Some sing. Some dance. They told me that someone even did spoken poetry (well, not too sure if it's the wow-that's-cool-daaamn kind of spoken poetry). 

The whole time before I got introduced, my blood was running cold. I was not prepared. 

I draw -- so why not?

I can't sing. It's not that I don't, it's that I can't. Karaoke nights with my closest friends in college can prove that. Dancing? Dude, I have two left feet. Don't even get me started with that.

But drawing, I can. So what I did was show them the video below and basically tell them about what I know to do: drawing.

The lingering question

Since then, my colleagues would ask me about my hobby every once in a while. They would ask me about my favorite medium, or what I liked to draw, or how I do it. 

...do I still draw?

From my recent posts, you can say that yes, I still draw. I think it's something that to me is innate. I've been getting back to traditional drawing (where it all started for me) that I completely let go of digital.

I can't remember the last time I really draw digitally.

Was it two years ago? Three? I can't really remember. My latest digital drawings (which were months ago) were literally sorry excuse of drawing digitally. I used to work with improvement in mind, and lately...

I felt like I hit a wall when it comes to digital drawing. 

So welcome to how I draw from seven years ago to today.

NARUTO: Team Seven

This was drawn when I was 15 years old, my first digital pen drawing. That's... the only drawing I have saved from seven years ago. 

That time (I was in high school), I went by the alias, sera-chan011, and drew so much my hands hurt. I tried to work with a graphics tablet, but I just couldn't get the hang of it. And yeah, eventually, I had to give up.

2 years into deviantart as sera-chan011, I lost interest. I decided to deactivate it and... well... my drawings as a 15-17 year old are gone from the world of internet. 

If you like to see how my deviantart used to look like before, you can check out the Wayback Machine of my dA. It's embarrassing, but that just goes to show how childish I used to be HAHAHA.

SasuSaku: The Marriage Booth

Surprisingly, via the power of Wayback Machine, I got to see this old drawing, too! Drawn in 2012 (I think?), I was so addicted with this particular Naruto pairing. I think this was around the time Sasuke seemed irredeemable. 

Around this time, I was beginning to adapt to drawing in vector, instead of via pen.

Tanisha

Eventually, I went by the alias still-aira in deviantart. During this time, I have fully adapted to using vector or vexel when it comes to drawing. Not anywhere good, but I was trying!

But I still wasn't contented. I wanted to improve so bad. I wanted to have a good feed. A good portfolio.

So I deactivated still-aira.

More SasuSaku

My blanket-chan deviantart account exists as my portfolio (kinda) of SasuSaku drawings (I was that dedicated). I began to adapt to a style that soon reflected in my current (kinda inactive) deviantart account, erangvee. It's at this point that I began to work hard to improve, and I am proud to say that I believe I did. 

From vectors...

To you're getting there drawings.

There's nowhere but UP!

Getting into a university that goes with the motto, "There's nowhere but UP!" I felt obliged to keep going. I realized that I can still do more, so more, I did.

---

These are things I want to keep doing.

These are the things I wanted to keep doing. As sera-chan011, as still-aira, as blanket-chan, as erangvee.

They were me with different art styles but with the same frustration. But they are the Aira that makes art because they can, not because it's a form of stress reliever. Writing this post makes me want to draw again, but other priorities have come to play.

Thus, I promise myself: someday. Maybe not today, but I promise, someday.