in art •  3 months ago

Welcome to Beastly Tales. Each has a message, a moral. All are meant to have an element of humour. Naturally, any names included do not depict real folk but are included as part of the joke.

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(As with Beastly Banter Beastly Tales is written and illustrated by Richard.)

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Rule Britannia,
Britannia rule the sea,
Britain will always have a Royal Navy.
History of Britain’s Royal Navy,
Annals of valour quite wavy.
From Francis Drake, these histories,
To Horatio Nelson, such mysteries.
Records are filled with both facts and fiction,
And held aloft, with much conviction.
Royal Navy captains were severe indeed,
But valorous overall, a very brave breed,
Along with this they could be quite cruel,
They were loath to suffer any fool,
And would hand out punishments that involved a whip,
To maintain discipline aboard their ship,
A “cat o’nine tails” was frequently used,
On a crew that was so often abused.
And when it came time to go into battles,
It was winner take all, of the goods and chattels.

Enter now Captain Horatio Wise.
He and his crew were after a prize.
They saw a French sloop in the Bay of Biscay.
And, although it seemed to be somewhat risky,
They fired their cannon from afar,
But unfortunately ran aground on a sand bar.
They had to await the next high tide,
Before they could sail again with rekindled pride.
Their “prize ship” of course, had sailed away.
Captain Wise could fight another day.

One year they were near the Barberry Coast,
When the Captain gave an unwise boast.
“If we don’t capture a prize ship this very day,”
“I’ll eat my hat and sail away.”
As twilight spread over the empty ocean,
The Captain had a realistic notion.
That he’d better look like he was eating his hat,
What he did look like was a dopey prat.
His crew who had felt the cato’nine tails lash,
Were up on deck, to see it, in a flash!

royal navy.png

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Glories and honors to the Royal Navy and only sorrows to the poor sailors.


That's the way it's been for all time. Thanks Armando.

Hannah loved your story. Never count your chickens or shops in his case before they hatched. 🤣

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Thanks for your comment.

Hahaha the crew who had felt the cato’nine tails lash were hoping to see the captain eating his hat, LOL


Thanks for your comment.

Horatio, Horatio, had a long way to go,
A fork, knife and hat, and a little sherry to dull the fact.
chewing leather wasn't clever, It taste like an old mat.
A condiment and salad on the side, would help to digest his pride.
A sprinkle of salt and a splash of pepper to make it more pallatable, more tolerable.


Instructive comment. Thanks.

The crew would have relished every second of the sight of the Captain eating his hat. Great poem.


Nice comment. Thanks.