BEASTLY TALES

GRIME AND INFESTATION

Uncle Hubert was a policeman, a cop.
As, indeed, had been his granddad, and pop.
Crime and Investigation was in their veins,
Finding villains and culprits, fundamentals for their brains.
Grime and Infestation, their good ladies did say.
That’s how they provide a living, yes, earn their pay.
“Infesting themselves in all that grime,”
“They should give it away, and not before time!”

Weasil McGurk was a well-known thug,
He was accustomed to spending long periods in the jug.
A villain, a thug a tear-away,
The sort that should be often put away.
Hubert, a Superintendent of Police,
Made that his mission, for those who pilfer and fleece.
Yes, all those guilty of infringement of law,
That grimey infestation, right to the core!

Now, it has been suggested that a policeman’s lot is not a happy one,
Hubert took issue with this, he thought it was fun.
He loved the look on the villain’s face,
When he told him he was a tremendous disgrace.
“It’s off to the “slammer” for you, my boy!”
“That’ll keep you on the straight and narrow, and give me some joy.”
Weasil McGurk went back to his cell,
He knew the way, he knew it so well.
There he would languish, contemplating his sins,
There he would sit, with other “has-beens”.
“A group of old lags we all are,”
“Used to jellied eels, not caviar!”

Grime and Infestation can pollute both genders,
Either can succumb to it, become repeat offenders.
Uncle Hubert wanted to look into their mind,
Yes, internally study the criminals to find,
Just exactly why, they were determined to be bad.
Were they mentally maladjusted, a passing fad?
Or just plain mean-spirited, a career foot-pad?