BEASTLY TALES

A HELPING HAND

Petunia Primrose went out to attend Evensong,
She was devoted to her faith, would do no wrong.
Fussy Freddie Flatbush was attending too,
Always fussing around, not enough to do.
Petunia stood, to sing the first hymn.
Demure, she was, so proper and prim!
Fussy Freddie saw a situation he thought grim.
Petunia’s dress had caught between the seats of her body,
Those protuberances were, by no means shoddy,
And so her dress material was caught in a crease,
Being woven from cotton, rather than fleece!

Petunia was lustily singing,
Whilst, in the steeple, bells were ringing.
Within such activity Fussy Freddie was compelled to correct,
What he considered to be a major defect.
He reached forward, over the pew,
To pull out the fabric, smoothness to pursue.

Well, Petunia was conflicted, in her own mind,
Just what had occurred afore, and behind?
She pirouetted, only to see something base,
Fussy Freddie staring vacuously into space.
Fussy Freddie, on his own part,
Knew that he’d a close call, touching the tart!
If she was so concerned to have her dress in a crease,
Then, next time, he would press it further in, without cease!