Beagles Are Assholes

Our baby, Arlo.

Last year my partner and I had been talking a lot about getting a puppy. We had researched some breeds and had an idea about who would fit best in our lifestyle, active but not too active, ok to be left alone while we went to work, fine on car and boat rides, tolerant to heat since we live in Florida. We had a tentative plan to be on the look out at local shelters for a handful of breeds. Then we went to visit family for Thanksgiving in Kentucky and everything changed.

My partner's uncle raises beagles to run rabbits and he had about 20 dogs in outdoor cages, including 3 puppies. It was getting colder at night and my heart is a push over so when he asked, "Do you guys want one?" we definitely had something to consider. We didn't know anything about beagles, they weren't on our list. But how do you say "no" to this face?!

Arlo, being held for the first time.

How could I leave the baby outside all winter?

We had a few days to think about it before driving back to Florida, but my partner and I were already in love with him. We did some quick research and despite seeing that beagles are hard to train we thought, "how hard could it be?" He'd raised some dogs before and had great results, it would just take some work.

How much could a dog this small possible pee? A lot.

I am hear to tell you, if you don't have the patience of a saint and hardwood floors, DO NOT GET A BEAGLE. This dog has been the biggest challenge of our relationship (and we've been through some stuff). Hard to train is an understatement! Beagles are stubborn, they don't listen, will not come when called, dig and chew/destroy everything, pee in the house multiple times a day and eat their own poop! Somehow we got lucky and got a quiet one, usually they are loud too.

At least he is good at sitting.

Thank goodness we already have an older dog who is well trained and patient himself, and he took care of a lot of the separation anxiety that often comes with a beagle. But the constant peeing on the floor... boy I tell you what, it is the worst! Still, still! at 11 months old he will pee right in front of and sometimes on me. We have tried all the training suggestions, treats, lots of potty breaks, positive re-enforcements, lots of attention, crate training... regardless it seems it is totally up to the mood Arlo is in whether or not he asks to go out, or just pees on the floor.

A very patient big brother.

We love this dog, when he is not driving us absolutely crazy, he is sweet, funny, affectionate with tons of adorable personality and the absolute best nap partner, but sometimes I can't stand him. His requiring constant attention is exhausting. We fought over taking him back for months. But he's ours now for better or worse, and he's gotten too soft after months of snuggles to ever make it in a cage outside. So, on days like today when I'm off work and home all day, when instead of asking to go out he jumps up on my grandmother's chair and pees while looking directly at me, I have to look back at his puppy pictures. I have to remind myself I'm not a violent person and that I love him, that he's cute and it's my own fault for falling for that puppy face before I knew what an asshole he could be.

Those ears though.

He has come a long way since we got him, and his non-accidental accidents are much fewer now, we can go days, days! without a pee inside. But seriously, if you are considering getting a beagle, do your research. They are adorable and hard to resist as puppies, but they are a huge challenge and deserve parents that are prepared to handle them and stick it out. We love this little guy, but honestly wouldn't have taken him had we known what we were in for. And that's not fair to him, or us. So now we're learning to live together and I just keep trying to focus on that sweet face and those big soft ears instead of the pee puddles.

This guy...